One of my personal favorite things about E3 is the eclectic crowd that it attracts. Considering how accessible videogames are these days, it’s not hard for anyone to think that people from all walks of life will migrate to the most epic gamer gathering spot of the year. And, to Destructoid’s enjoyment, they all possess a relatively unfiltered brain, and will say pretty much anything that comes to mind. That’s why we write it down.
This year, the Dtoid clan retained open ears, and listened carefully for anything out of place, kooky, or just plain hilarious that came out of anyone’s mouth (this includes our own). I was tasked with collecting it all and compiling it together for your reading pleasure.
Please enjoy this look into the industry gamer’s brain.
“Shitting in the dark? Yes!”
— Man in the West Hall restroom (regarding the low lighting conditions).
“Why do French guys always come to E3 wearing suits, or is that a prerequisite when you hit 35? This is America, you’re supposed to dress like shit.”
— Pasty-looking teen at the Microsoft press event
“I wear women’s deodorant!”
— Daniel Starkey
“I wanted to bitch slap Mr. Caffeine.”
— Michael Pachter
“I have it on good authority that you have a top notch asshole.”
— Jim Sterling
“There’s more meat on this meat.”
— Hamza Aziz (regarding a particular steak skewer from our last E3 dinner together)
“Is that urine (on the floor)?”
“Doesn’t smell like it.”
“The urinal is full of vomit.”
“That’s probably it.”
— Patrons at a post-E3 party
“Want to give each other massages up on the [Dance Central 3] stage?”
— Hello Games developer
Guy 1: “I think I’m going to have diarrhea.”
Guy 2: “I think I still have pizza at my place.”
Guy 3: “Yeah, let’s go back and watch some more Power Rangers.”
— Three attendees outside the L.A. Convention Center (all in the same conversation)
