Destructoid’s games of the week for 7/29/07: -CENSORED- edition!

The entirety of this post has been removed due to conflicting internal and external interests. The Board sincerely apologizes to our shareholders for any inconveniences this may have caused, and we have mailed all of your significant others large bundles of flowers. Thank you for your patience.

Sincerely,

The Board of Directors 

The board doesn’t play games, but the editors do. Here’s their weekly results: 

Ron Workman:
Man, this Internet is something else. Boom Boom Rocket, Wing Commander Arena, Centipede. I don’t like Phist. He beats me at night and makes me toss the salad, and also Super Contra. For the Wii I have been playing Roots the Movie. OK. That was too far. Actually… Thats funny. Oh, and Bomberman LIVE by the great folks at Hudson Entertainment. Bomberman LIVE is now available on Xbox Live Arcade. Buy it today and girls will want you.

Chad Concelmo:
I haven’t played much at all since that boy wizard took over my entire weekend. A little Bomberman Live! here, a little Super Mario 64 there. Other than that, it was all reading and posing in front of horses naked.

Nick Chester:
I couldn’t hold out for the XBLA version, so I picked up Puzzle Quest for the Nintendo DS. I’m still playing through Ninja Gaiden Sigma on the PlayStation 3, and whenever I get a free moment, I hop on XBLA and play some Pac-Man C.E. because I am determined to beat Chad Concelmo’s 330,000+ score (I’ve just broken 300,000).

Dale North:
The North Manor entertained company this week, so we brought out the good vintage: Rival Schools, Soul Blade, Street Fighter EX Alpha, and the original PS1 Marvel vs. Capcom. The rest of the time has been spent with Marvel Vs Capcom 2, a PS2 game that looks absolutely stunning upscaled on a PS3.

Leigh Alexander:
I’ve been playing Pokemon Pearl and the game that makes everyone else jealous of me, Persona freakin’ 3. Nyah, nyah.

Nex:
With my 360 still broken, I’ve spent the week getting back to my theoretical jRPG roots via Dragon Quest VIII. If you haven’t read the BBL Aaron did on it a while back, you ought to, as it nails it directly on its armor-plated head. The entire game is SO INTENSELY  old school, and requires a bit of grinding, but once you get past all of that, you’re rewarded with some of the finest art and storytelling in any RPG out there.
Oh, and I think I’ve become sexually attracted to Slimes. It’s simply not healthy.

.tiff:
Having a day yob at one of those internet companies can be pretty rad, especially when the internets stop working and my co-workers bust out Guitar Hero Encore: Rock the 80s and jam until the tubes start working again.  Otherwise, still going’ at it with teh Pokemons.

Niero:
I played through all three minutes of Heavenly Sword!  Seriously though, I’m slowly trying to inch my way up through the Nucleus and Super Stardust HD leader boards.  I also finally had the chance to pillage the Eternal Sonata and Blue Dragon demos (HEY NINJA THEORY — THEY GAVE US ONE HOUR!) and have a copy of Granado Espada and Final Fantasy 2 burning a hole in my pocket. If you have a PS3 I recommend setting up a Japanese account to get a free PS1 game called Xi(die?) which consists of running over interconnecting dice with a small cute girl in a red jumpsuit.  I can’t beat the first level but it’s cute as hell.  I also want to confess that I truly suck at Bomberman Live and am doing cock-pushups at home to compensate, no thanks to Chad and Grim.

Grim:
Moto GP 07 had been sitting on my shelf for far too long, so I finally sat down and actually played the game — big mistake. Total Overdose came to Gametap, so of course I was excited as hell to play it. I think it might be the most awesomely retarded game I’ve ever seen. Other than that it’s been mostly Bomberman Live! and a little Wing Commander Arena.

Rev Anthony:
I’ve been replaying Knights of the Old Republic and Okami (hopefully, this time I’ll actually finish it), and I just got into Sleuth, an online detective game. Really simplistic, but irritatingly enjoyable.

Jim Sterling:
Orcist pretty much has been the sole commander of my Xbox 360. I think his isolated time in France has starved him of good gaming for a while. I did try Knights of the Old Republic for the first time ever, but wasn’t keen at all. Otherwise, I’ve been sneaking in games of Bomberman Live and failing brutally, which is a shame because I was getting quite good at it. Easy come, easy go.

Topher Cantler:
I’ve been playing the Japanese version of Rival Schools 2: Project Justice for Dreamcast, and I can’t tell you how long I’ve wanted to say that. I’d say it twice, but I’ve been repeating myself enough this week, what with every comment I make on the homepage asexually reproducing when I submit it. (Sorry about that, I don’t know why it’s happening.)

After all the sweet victory on my Dreamcast, I’m getting my ego cut back down on XBLA, where Bomberman Live and Super Contra have both been kind enough to remind me how bad I suck at most video games.

Dick McVengeance:

I’ve been playing around with the Fullmetal Alchemist TCG game for the DS (it’s for Japanator, I swear!), along with popping in Persona 3. Otherwise, I’ve been taken away from my consoles due to Harry Potter 7, as well as Anansi Boys and The Divine Comedy. See, bloggers can read too, y’know!

Colette Bennett:

I suck at Bomberman Live, but God it’s cute. Dear Lord. As I get my Live account set up this week, I’ll probably be testing the waters with new games right and left. In PSP world, I’m paying Loco Roco and about to pick up Phantasy Star collection. Whee!

Aaron Linde:
Digging into the Tabula Rasa beta and not really digging it as much as I’d hoped. At the end of the day, I think I’m just not an MMO kind of dude — no biggie, just how the cookie crumbles. In the mean time, still plugging away at Bomberman Live and revisiting the Bit Generations GBA titles for a forthcoming feature that I was doing before E3, and then promptly forgot afterwards.

Orcist:
Jim has hit the nail on its oxidized, rusty, tetanus-covered head — it’s hard to game when you’re having adventures and traipsing and whatnot. In any case, I’ve been playing a shedload of Pacman C.E.(Damn you, Blinky! Damn you to HELL!) and Boom Boom Rocket, with some TMNT and Sonic thrown in for good measure. Moving away from XBLA, I’ve been playing a bit of Overlord, power-grinding in FFIII DS, and trying to get myself unstuck in Portrait of Ruin.

Dyson Grigsby:
I’m still not playing Bomberman Live with my friends due to its buggy online component which, of course, pisses me off. It’s like being given a can of crack without a can opener. Other than that, I haven’t played anything new this week. Most of my time has this week has been spent reading about the adventures of a young wizard and his quest to defeat You-Know-Who.

Although, last night I played Bionic Commando for two hours.

Faith:
I’ve been playing Lord of the Rings: Battle for Middle Earth 2 on Xbox 360 and I love it. The controls are a lot easier than I thought they would be. I’ve always been playing Phoenix Wright on my DS at work. People keep coming over to see what all the noise is and then laugh at how the characters look when they are frustrated.

Gameboi:

I’m still waiting for Microsoft to send me a friggin’ coffin for my Xbox 360 after saying they sent it off last week. So where the Hell is it? Meanwhile,  I’ve been drowning my sorrows in a couple of PS2 games. Ratchet & Clank: Up Your Arsenal, and Fatal Frame III: The Tormented have been vying for my affection this week. Both have been very good to me, but then again — they always were.

David Houghton:
It’s been a bit of a 2D frenzy for me this week, with Street Fighter II Turbo, Street Fighter Alpha 2, Metal Slug and Gunstar Heroes all getting a look in, mostly played less than sober at parties. Bomberman has been delighting my thumbs as well, but alas it was Super Bomberman on the SNES rather than anything Xbox related. Damn it, I need to be on Live.

 

Now is the time that we ask for reader input! What have you people, out there in Cyberspace, been playing all week? A gold star to anyone who’s been playing a Shin Megami Tensei game that isn’t Persona 3

Earnest Cavalli
I'm Nex. I used to work here but my love of cash led me to take a gig with Wired. I still keep an eye on the 'toid, but to see what I'm really up to, you should either hit up my Vox or go have a look at the Wired media empire.