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A la cartridge: Throwing back a Kutaro Smoothie  photo
A la cartridge: Throwing back a Kutaro Smoothie
by Steven Hansen

We were feeling pretty bad about ourselves after last week's Grand Theft Auto V episode of A la Cartridge wherein we made a pastrami-topped triple chili cheese dog burrito. Yes, it was as absurd as it sounds.

Accordingly, we decided to make something healthy for Puppeteer, the delightful platformer from Sony Japan. Smoothies are a cheap, quick and easy venture and manage to pack a whole lot of good taste into a small package. This one is extra good for you, too, just like how different and creative games like Puppeteer are healthy for the gaming industry amidst AAA action games and brown military shooters.

These make for a great quick breakfast or lunch. You can even parcel out your fruit ahead of time, freeze it, and always be ready to Kuta-go.

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Grand Theft Swallow: 5-Star Wanted Burrito Bomb photo
Grand Theft Swallow: 5-Star Wanted Burrito Bomb
by Steven Hansen

I could barely fit it all in my mouth.

Grand Theft Auto V comes out next week, so we decided to make something fittingly huge and insane for this week's A la Cartridge. None of the fun and whimsy of last week's Dustin Hoffman x Rayman Legends crossover.

Well, that's not true. There is still some fun. I talk about dog customization and try to fit something of unrivaled girth into my mouth. Tip: three sausages is overkill. Between three of us, we finished half of this triple chili-cheese-dog, pastrami-topped burrito. 

Check out the video, full recipe below, and let me know if this dish Grand Theft Auto-matically made your stomach turn. It's damn tasty in spite of its absurdity, honest.

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7:00 PM on 09.04.2013

PAX highlight: Olimeat and Porkmin

I'm slowly recovering from a wild and crazy PAX weekend. I've been to PAX East twice in the past, but this was my first time attending Prime. It was beyond a doubt the most emotionally polarizing con I have ever attended, fil...

Tony Ponce







A la cartridge: Rayman's Legendary Chilaquiles photo
A la cartridge: Rayman's Legendary Chilaquiles
by Steven Hansen

Food is good. Videogames are good. Food inspired by videogames is doubleplusgood. It's simple science. Science and art. The third episode of Steven Hansen's À la cartridge is inspired by Rayman Legends. In my quest to become the Alton Brown of videogames, will I become videogames' Guy Fieri?

Last week we went quintessential Americana with the Killer is Dead Mondo Burger. Now, we're heading south of the US border, to Mexico, to duck those murder raps and eat some Legendary Chilaquiles. Rayman Legends is a great couch co-op game and chilaquiles is a chill-and-easy dish that serves plenty.

Feel free to stir some scrambled eggs in as well. Go nuts. It's in the spirit of Rayman. I almost added candy eyeballs to everything.

This episode of A la cartridge is brought to you by Rainman's Raymond Babbit.  

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A la cartridge: Killer is Dead's Mondo Burger photo
A la cartridge: Killer is Dead's Mondo Burger
by Steven Hansen

Food is good. Videogames are good. Food inspired by videogames are doubleplusgood. It's simple science. Science and art. The third episode of Steven Hansen's À la cartridge is inspired by Killer is Dead. In my quest to become the Alton Brown of videogames, will I become videogames' Guy Fieri?

After last week's vegetarian reprieve, Pasta di Pikmin, we're taking a return to meat with the Killer is Dead-inspired Mondo Burger. Grasshopper's new game dropped yesterday and a lot of you are really interested in it, if yesterday's exploded comment section on my feature is any indication. 

I invite you to take a break from that madness and, Killer Instead, cook yourself something nice. This is a simple, powerful burger with some teeth to it. The full recipe is below.

Killer is fed.

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A la cartridge: Pasta di Pikmin photo
A la cartridge: Pasta di Pikmin
by Steven Hansen

Food is good. Videogames are good. Food inspired by videogames are doubleplusgood. It's simple science. Science and art. This is the second episode of Steven Hansen's À la cartridge, a straightforward cooking show where I teach you how to make tasty things and talk about the games that inspire them. In my quest to become the Alton Brown of videogames, will I become videogames' Guy Fieri?

This week, we take a reprieve from meat and tackle a vegetarian dish. Yes, it's still mad tasty. Bell peppers are the best, especially when well pepp-ared. It's also probably easier than last week's Dragon's Crown-inspired pork shoulder and potatoes. Just throw things in fire! (more detailed recipe below)

If you're in the Olimar-ket for good eats, this Pikmin 3 platter is sure to please. Plus, you can make a whole bunch on the cheap and have leftovers for days. Watch the video. It only takes a few pikmin-utes.  I think I talk less stupidly and we're getting closer to eliminating jump cuts. Any sort of recipe you'd like to see done next? Any particular game? Want to comment on my fabulous shirt?

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6:30 PM on 08.19.2013

Inside every Mega Man is a Meat Boy

You've crossed the fans for the last time, Capcom! How DARE you infiltrate the Uwajimaya Asian grocery store in Seattle and reshape the deli meats to resemble Mega Man and Cut Man instead of using all of that wasted time to a...

Tony Ponce



A la cartridge: Dragon's Crown pork monster photo
A la cartridge: Dragon's Crown pork monster
by Steven Hansen

Food is good. Videogames are good. Food inspired by videogames are doubleplusgood. It's simple science. Science and art. I would like to humbly present the first episode of Steven Hansen's À la cartridge, a straightforward cooking show where I teach you how to make tasty things and talk about the games that inspire them. 

In my quest to become the Alton Brown of videogames, will I become videogames' Guy Fieri? Will I remember to get a knife sharpener so I don't swear into the camera when I cut myself? Will the sorceress in Dragon's Crown invest in proper bust support to nip future back problems in the bud? 

Find out by watching the inaugural episode, in which I cook a gigantic pork shoulder and rosemary potatoes (full recipe below). And tell me what I can do to improve. What upcoming games might you want to see a dish for?

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11:52 PM on 06.13.2013

Get your own Dew n' Doritos Xbox One package yeah!

Microsoft has revealed the fruits of its disgusting sex with PepsiCo, announcing its special "Dew n' Doritos" Xbox One cross-promotion will let you win a special box of vaguely edible items. Major Nelson is giving some of the...

Jim Sterling

10:20 AM on 06.10.2013

'Dew and Doritos' teaming up with Xbox One ... seriously

In what is either the most hilarious or most disgusting move ever, a new website called Dew & Doritos has opened to co-promote snack foods and Microsoft. Yes, the long-running partnership between the Xbox brand and Dorito...

Jim Sterling

6:00 PM on 05.06.2013

Doritos Crash Course 2 arrives on XBLA this Wednesday

Minecraft. Call of Duty. Doritos Crash Course. These are the games that have defined our console generation and, at long last, we will reenter the magnificent world of Doritos-flavored platforming with Doritos Crash Course 2,...

Allistair Pinsof

6:00 AM on 05.04.2013

This Surgeon Simulator cake is super gross

The guys behind Surgeon Simulator 2013 had a special cake made to celebrate the game's success. It's themed after what you do in the game, and well, it's pretty damn gross. So gross that I put it below the fold in case you'r...

Hamza CTZ Aziz

1:45 PM on 04.29.2013

Deadly Premonition: The Director's Cut ... in the coffee

A box arrived for me today, and I had a good idea of what it was. Not only was I expecting Deadly Premonition: Director's Cut to arrive today, the package absolutely stank of raw coffee and toothpaste. It could only be one th...

Jim Sterling



How to order a pizza from Xbox Live photo
How to order a pizza from Xbox Live
by Conrad Zimmerman

Microsoft and Pizza Hut have teamed up to provide a service which allows people to order food through their Xbox 360 console and have it delivered to their homes. It's either the innovation truly lazy gamers have been waiting their entire lives for or one of the silliest things we've ever seen on the system. Either way, we needed to have Hamza place an order. Check out the video of his experience!

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8:00 AM on 04.23.2013

Pizza Hut Kinect ordering coming to Xbox 360 today

Microsoft has added a new way to make cash aside from its advertisements, sponsored games, and Xbox Live Gold subscriptions, now offering an app that lets you order Pizza Hut food directly from your Xbox ... and it's better w...

Jim Sterling



Jimquisition: Perfect Pasta Sauce  photo
Jimquisition: Perfect Pasta Sauce
by Jim Sterling

This week, Jimquisition gives you a brief lesson in pasta sauce, and ties it into the misguided quest for perfection currently plaguing the so-called "AAA" title scene.

Expanding on a few ideas found in last week's episode, today is all about variety, expectation, and catering to the silent markets that could be making publishers money, if only they bothered paying attention ... and learned a thing or two about pasta.

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