Lick them fingers good: KFC starts gaming division

11 nerds and spices

Just earlier today, before lunch, I was thinking to myself, “What a boring-ass day. There is nothing that could happen today that would make this day not-boring. What a waste.”

As though he were an angel watching down from fast-food heaven with a bucket of good news to shovel into my gaping maw, Jonathan Holmes sent me this. As a warning, what you’re about to watch could be considered NSFW depending on how turned on you get by ridiculous shit:

That’s right folks, KFC is allegedly getting into gaming. And I know we’re all thinking the same thing here: What the hell took so long?

While fast food chains getting into gaming may be old hat at this point with Yo! Noid probably starting the craze back in 1990 (you can correct me if I’m wrong in the comments below because I’m not doing anymore research into this topic as my life is already in shambles), Burger King took shit to the next level in 2006 with its trio of horribly fantastic games. PocketBike Racer and Big Bumpin’ were fine, I guess, but the true star of that terrible experiment was Sneak King.

If you’re unfamiliar with Sneak King, shame on you. Being able to control The King as he snuck around giving regular people two heart attacks — first by scaring the shit out of them by popping out from a trash can while they were just trying to walk to fucking work, and then by making them eat Burger King’s salty, calorie-ridden food — is the pinnacle of gaming.

How does The Colonel compete with The King at this point? While having a 12-year upgrade in technology could prove to be an advantage, the fact is that KFC is already at a huge disadvantage in that The Colonel is just ill-suited to out-ridiculous the majesty that is Sneak King.

They’re no strangers to gaming culture, but nothing could really shock me unless ol’ Sanders stars in a full-on Katamari Damacy clone where you must roll up chicken breasts in levels full of things that could be considered spicy in order to make the perfect recipe.

And even still, they’d still be under the scrutinous shadow of The King.

KFC Gaming [Twitter]

About The Author
Wes Tacos
Contest Baboon, part-time Mod, full-time dick joke specialist. Destructoid's official Hot Biscuits. I've personally backed exactly one KickStarter/crowdfunding project: Sony's PlayStation, by Dtoid community member darrenhupke.
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