Comments of the Week: Number five has arrived!

Promoted from our Community Blogs

[Has it already been five weeks of CotW? I’m sure thankful that Dreamweaver is doing the lord’s work with a weekly round up of Destructoid’s weirdest and most insightful comments! Want to see your own comment featured? Join the community participate in the discussion today! -Striderhoang]

Welcome back to Comments of the Week, and I’m your host, Dreamweaver! Comments of the Week is a series where I showcase a bunch of comments I enjoyed reading throughout the week to share with the community who might’ve missed them with the other personal matters in their lives!

Being up for display is a great honor, as not only are you singled out, but you also get a second chance to shine to the people who might’ve missed your comments the first time around!

As always, comments will be placed under these fine categories:

TRUTH: because the truth hurts.

LOL: because rolling on the floor is painful.

WUT?: because you’ll never find out which is worse: getting kicked in the nuts or childbirth.

Huh, now I’m curious: which is worse? Because I know you got an entire body coming out of your vagina. But come on, being kicked in the nuts is like me squeezing your uterus like a dog’s chew toy; it hurts! Once, I got kicked down there so hard that I literally dropped to the floor and I felt like I was going to throw up.

Out of my mouth. Not my penis.

Where was I? Oh, right, Comments of the Week. Let’s get started!

From The original Doom gets a ‘selfie support’ fan mod

Dreamweaver: I always knew those pickled gherkins taste of pure evil…

From How short is too short? Controversy over The Order: 1886‘s length

Dreamweaver: It’s not the length that matters, it’s whether or not you enjoy it. Oh, that also applies to games.

From Details revealed for microtransaction-laden Pokémon Shuffle and they’re pretty disgusting

Dreamweaver: Just because it’s free doesn’t excuse it. Garbage is free and back then you could even get cash for recycling.

From Sony appears to have ‘abandoned’ its trademark for The Last Guardian

Dreamweaver: That’s cold… William.

Dreamweaver: It has to be made first before it can be lost.

From Link is the most popular amiibo in the world, US and Canada account for 63% of all amiibo shipments

Dreamweaver: Guess he’s not the “weakest” Link after all…

From Last Guardian ‘still in development’ despite trademark abandonment

Dreamweaver: Plot twist: The Last Guardian is the little boy and the the last human on Earth.

From Letters to the editor: Why should I keep reading Destructoid?

Dreamweaver: Best endorsements you can get for any website.

From Square Enix is taking pitches for a new Gex

Dreamweaver: Who would’ve Gex’ed?

From I bet you’d like some Predator in your Mortal Kombat X

Dreamweaver: Scares pedophiles more than the Predator.

Dreamweaver: He really is.

From Very Quick Tips: Pokémon Shuffle

Dreamweaver: If you need tips on how not to get screwed over by microtransactions, then the game probably isn’t worth playing.

From 33% off Inquisition, 10% off Xbox One & PS4 bundle deals for the holiday weekend

Dreamweaver: Ouya? Ooh rah!

From Here’s the rub on the Best Buy Meta Knight amiibo in-store situation

Dreamweaver: I’ve heard that joke before but I really got a kick out of the execution!

From How short is too short? Controversy over The Order: 1886‘s length

Dreamweaver: That’s just hilarious man.

From What the hell?! Captain Toad has a spin attack!

Dreamweaver: But still arousing.

Dreamweaver: He’s got 99 things in that bag but a gun ain’t one.

From What would it be like if Nintendo ran a theme park?

Dreamweaver: I would love to come on that ride.

Dreamweaver: I love that his avatar is still giving a thumbs up.

From Internal Gamestop memo notes massive delay for pre-ordered amiibo, no duplicates even with reserves

Dreamweaver: By feeding them Mike and Ikes?

From Review: The Order: 1886

Dreamweaver: Returning to the store real soon.

Dreamweaver: Them wordplays!

From The hunt is on for the Metal Knight amiibo, here is what I found

Dreamweaver: Well, now I’m disappointed.

From True Life: One man’s descent into deliriumiibo

Dreamweaver: And still come up short, judging by how much amiibo go for.

Dreamweaver: Yeah, science!

From Surprise! Kids are annoying and god awful at Super Meat Boy

Dreamweaver: The nightmare’s never over.

Dreamweaver: Selling pitchforks here!

From The original Doom gets a ‘selfie support’ fan mod

Dreamweaver: Only one response to this.

From Nintendo predicted the amiibo shortage 11 years ago

Dreamweaver: Gajknight has to answer to life.

From Watch Villager pocket all of the moves in Super Smash Bros. Wii U

Dreamweaver: Yeah, the art of ass kicking!

From There’s no regular-size New 3DS in North America because it’d be too confusing

Dreamweaver: I would love to see this happen!

Dreamweaver: Show of hands, who did?

From Final Fantasy XIV: A Realm Reborn‘s Gold Saucer looks amazing

Dreamweaver: We have our own smut peddler who draws his own Rule 34.

From Tingle is the heterosexual hero that gaming deserves

Dreamweaver: What about the actual questions that matter, like how big his cock is?

From Nazi zombies in Trials Fusion, yes, Trials Fusion

Dreamweaver: Wunderbar!

From Year of the Goat: goats/sheep/rams in videogames

Dreamweaver: What a surprise. We’re all so very shocked.

Alright, then, that’s it for this edition! I hope you guys enjoyed yourselves! As always, suggestions will be read and appreciated, and we’ll shoot for another episode next week! Remember, I can’t do this without YOU!

No, seriously, I can’t: it’s YOUR comments (and occasionally mine, because I’m conceited like that) that makes up this feature, so don’t be shy!