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5:59 PM on 10.18.2007

Final Fantasy: Crystal Chronicles WiiWare scans dispel the nightmares of Pop

Some new scans from Famitsu (Who else?) have appeared on the ever useful NeoGAF forums, showing off some new images of Square-Enix's Final Fantasy: Crystal Chronicles: The Small King And The Promised Land, and they're looking...

David Houghton



Gallery for posterity: The complete Lair Reviewer's Guide.  [Update: Contest!] photo
Gallery for posterity: The complete Lair Reviewer's Guide. [Update: Contest!]
by Niero Gonzalez

[CONTEST Update: Want this booklet for your very own swag collection?  Take a page from the booklet and PhotoShop (or MSPaint) something hilarious and we'll pick our favorite entry next Friday. We'll also send you a random shirt from our local thrift shop, so get P'chopping!]

You've read the crap Lair reviews. You've rubbernecked through the peculiar string of fatal car crashes that resembles the Factor 5's feedback about those dirty little playtime diaries. You're probably as curious as we were when we heard about the 21-page "reviewer's guide" that popped up today, so we've put the whiskey down for a second and scanned the entire volume for your clicking enjoyment. 

All jokes aside, the guide isn't chock-full of marketing-speak on why the game is revolutionary and more awesome than your God.  It's surprisingly devoid of lame attempts to sway a reviewer from saying anything unfair or negative about the game.  The only thing we can fairly pick on is the president's introductory plea on page 1 to give the game (and his horrible decision to force Sixaxis controls down your throat) a chance.  Instead of a review guide, this may as well have been more accurately labeled as the biggest instruction manual ever produced. Has anyone contacted the Guiness Book people yet?

While this slickness of this volume is appreciated, it's a fact of life that gamers (especially editors) are too busy/excited/intoxicated to READ THE F@#$%KING MANUAL so to send us a giant one seems, well, more likely to soak in more grease from last night's chinese food than the other things left abandoned on the coffee table. 

 

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4:39 PM on 08.30.2007

Tekken 6 goes tubby: new character is a fat guy named Bob

While other next-generation fighters are shooting for sexy, busty new character designs, it looks like the team behind Tekken is shooting for the chubby chaser crowd.Namco Bandai's other fighter may have just added a bit mor...

Dale North

8:02 AM on 08.18.2007

I has a manual: Halo 3 manual scans for the obsessive who has everything

[Video removed due to a scary copyright infringement email from Microsoft. No Halo for you!] We in the 'hardcore' demographic of the gaming community might not be quite as hyped for Halo 3 as we are for certain other gam...

Jim Sterling

11:45 AM on 08.09.2007

More new Mario Galaxy images and details, more explosions of joy

I've played a hell of a lot of Mario over the years. A hell of a lot. From the NES to the Gameboy, to the SNES, to the N64, to the Gamecube, to the DS, I've played through virtually every game in the series, yet still a new M...

David Houghton

9:00 AM on 08.08.2007

New Famitsu Scans: Chocobo's Mysterious Dungeon

For where there is Chocobo, evil dares not tread. The prophecy foretells of a time when the yellow-crested harbingers of Instrumentality will stride forth as heralds of joy across the marshes and mountains as a ray of beauty ...

Leigh Alexander

1:16 PM on 07.09.2007

New GTA IV details and scans

These Grand Theft Auto IV scans are from the latest issue of the British gaming mag Games TM. The 7-page-long exclusive preview contains details about the gameplay and some brand new in-game pics that make me feel all warm in...

Kayka

11:15 AM on 07.06.2007

New NiGHTS screens, courtesy of Famitsu

It's been a while since we last saw anything of the Wii's NiGHTS: Journey Of Dreams, and it's safe to say that back then things were certainly less than arousing in the visuals department. Well thanks to the omni...

David Houghton

8:38 PM on 05.20.2007

First images of Croteam's Serious Engine 3 are all serious and stuff

Croatian gaming magazine, GamePlay, has nabbed the first look at Croteam's upcoming Serious Sam 3 and the yet to be named tactical-action shooter. Thanks to space-aged image scanning technology and the kids over at the Se...

Nick Chester

11:21 AM on 05.12.2007

Dewy's Adventure looks like a Wiiiiiiiinner

Kawaii overload! While some must continue to suffer from famine at the Wii's casual and cutesy game library, others will rejoice at these new screenshots of Dewy's Adventure; a spinoff platformer title from Konami'...

Niero Gonzalez





10:59 AM on 05.09.2007

Final Fantasy IV DS, Dissidia, and Final Fantasy XII Zodiac Job Thang scans

Keeping up with Square-Enix's avalanche of Final Fantasy development in the last few years has been a handful, but very exciting for the RPG gamer. This fresh paella of scans comes from the latest Shonen Jump.  Each ...

Niero Gonzalez

11:17 AM on 04.25.2007

More reasons to make love to your DS: new Dragon Quest IX scans

JeuxFrance acquired a set of scans revealing fresh details of Dragon Quest IX: a game given a new release date every time we hear about it.  The big news is the changes in the combat system: it's back to turn-based...

Niero Gonzalez

8:02 AM on 04.04.2007

Famitsu reveals Resident Evil Umbrella Chronicles info, confirms RE 4 Wii-make

First the good news -- the previously mentioned Resident Evil 4 Wii remake leaked by retailers has been confirmed by Famitsu. Not surprisingly, Wii remote functionality has been added. Players will be able to aim with the Wii...

Nick Chester

2:01 PM on 03.30.2007

First screens of NiGHTS sequel on the Wii

We reported on this highly anticipated Wii exclusive being more or less official earlier this week, but I guess this makes it extra official. Unless this is just some (very) elaborate April Fool’s joke. And if that is t...

Chad Concelmo

8:40 AM on 03.28.2007

Get all touchy-feely with Ninja Gaiden Dragon Swords

Are you sitting down? Tomonobu Itagaki and Team Ninja have announced a new Ninja Gaiden game! Its name? Ninja Gaiden Dragon Swords. But here's the rub (*ahem*) -- it's for the Nintendo DS. Get it? Dragon Swords? DS?...

Nick Chester



Forget After Burner -- Ace Combat 6 drops exclusive bombs on your 360 moms photo
Forget After Burner -- Ace Combat 6 drops exclusive bombs on your 360 moms
by Niero Gonzalez

While we wait for Sega to step up and bring that next-gen After Burner from behind closed doors, the Xbox 360's exclusive jet fighter franchise looks like it's seeing a nice visual upgrade in Ace Combat 6. Check out the GameBrink-leaked scans for more details and screenshots (and good luck with the kanji, domo-face). Well, maybe forget Warhawk is more appropriate -- as the once flashy headlining PS3 game has become a mixed air-land oddity being dumped on the network soon. Bleh. Here's what's new:

There will be two huge additions to the series with the first being the Dynamic Mission system. Players will be teaming up with ally pilots that can be manipulated to take care of various tasks outside the scope of the primary objective, which can then open up new missions mid-battle.

The other addition? Online play, of course. While no number of players are mentioned, there are currently battle royal and team battle modes, as well as a co-operative play that allows players to team-up against an enemy force. 

If I may go off on a tangent: I'd like to see one of these archetype flying games deviate from the realistic war genre convention and become more "shmupy", but they always maintain a sort of clinical play control and art direction. I think we're long overdue for a polished blow-stuff-up sci-fi shooter, perhaps by fault of ours for ceasing to buy those kinds of games completely in the 90's when FPS hit. I'm sorry, enough already! Next-gen Aero Blaster, anyone?

While that cry falls on deaf ears, here's 3 high res scans of what's to come:

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