V for Very Smooth Indeed
How often will we see our own genitalia in Cyberpunk 2077, a first-person shooter role-playing game? I don’t know, CD Projekt Red sure put a lot of thought into what our bushes look like.
As importantly reported on by Kotaku Australia (and importantly re-reported on here), there are five types of pubic hair in Cyberpunk 2077. However, it stops short of saying what those options are. Are these just hairstyles for your nether region? Are we talking landing strip, a V (as homage to the protagonist), and a giant wiry unkempt fur coat?
Surely, Cyberpunk 2077 gives us the option to take a laser beam to our junk. A laser beam is the only way to completely obliterate the follicle so that it’s like a turtle shell down there. It’s like that scene in Dead Space 2 but lower.
Here’s the full breakdown of customizables by the numbers: “6 skin types, 35 hairstyles, 17 eyes, 8 eyebrows, 17 eyes, 17 mouths, 17 jaws, 17 ears, 8 bits of ‘cyberware’ (as well as no cyberware), 9 types of scars plus off, 6 types of tatts plus off, 11 piercings plus off, 5 types of teeth, 8 bits of eye makeup, 5 bits of lip makeup plus off, 3 blemishes, 3 types of nipples, 5 types of body tatts, 2 types of body scars, 2 dick types, 1 vagina option, dick size options, and 5 types of pubic hairs.”
All those cool options and like half of you are just gonna pick a default-lookin’ dude with a low-hangin’ dick.