Virtual lovin’ leads to real stabbin’

The Something Awful forums are a lot like the French Salons of the 19th century. They are a place where the erudite and cultural elite can amass to share philosophies, questions and ideals. Of course, they are also home to some of the most idiotic things on the Internet, and as of January 12th, they became home to pictures of a fat stabbing victim and his pathetically hilarious story.

SA Goon, TaintSupportSc0tt, is by no means a small man, as you can see in the above picture, but he still did not deserve the vicious attack by his adulterous wife. It turns out that she had taken a lover behind his back, but it wasn’t the mailman or his best friend, no, it was a sexy Night Elf from World of Warcraft, and that kind of betrayal was something he just couldn’t take. After verbally accosting her for being such an e-slut, she went totally mental and after trying, unsuccessfully, to stab him with a fork, managed to backstab him with a knife for critical damage. As you can see from the above picture, it was kind of a massive wound, and if his copious fat hadn’t absorbed the blow, he could have been killed, or, at least, very uncomfortable.

I think the entire incident is best summed up by the first SA Goon to respond to Mr. Taint, a gentleman by the name of BrianJ. He, eloquently states;

Did her skill with forks go up?

Did her skill with forks go up, indeed! The world may never know …

Earnest Cavalli
I'm Nex. I used to work here but my love of cash led me to take a gig with Wired. I still keep an eye on the 'toid, but to see what I'm really up to, you should either hit up my Vox or go have a look at the Wired media empire.