There’s Castlevania Rebirth footage somewhere in here

Look, if Jonathan Holmes can make four little screens of Castlevania Rebirth work, I can do the same with these tiny snippets of video.

Sure, there’s only a few seconds of hot new Castlevania Rebirth footage interspersed between Nintendo Weekly’s silly flashlight narration, but it’s new, and it’s worth looking at. I mean, the first WiiWare Castlevania is big news, right? It looks hot, and has big-ass bats and eyeballs to whip up. 

I have nothing else for you. Really. The closest I have to Tron’s equal opportunity sexy borders is the cute blonde in the video, Alison. She says nothing, though, as she peers into our soul and makes you excited for Castlevania: Rebirth. I don’t know if it’s working, Allison, but call me anyway.