Here’s a little tip for you: Thieving DS Lites from kids won’t help you get laid. If only unemployed 17-year-old twat Anthony Etienne knew that sooner, he might not have stolen a handheld from a little girl in order to impress a lady.
Etienne needed cash to take out some prospective female company. Having no money of his own, he figured he’d steal a little girl’s DS Lite and flog it for the green. Here’s Etienne, in his own words, explaining why he did it. Oh, and if you wondered why he didn’t have a job, this unedited written statement might clue you in:
I did not have no money to impress her, so if I thought that if I take this lil girl’s DS, I can make some money. I tapped her shoulder. I said, ‘Give it.’ She said, ‘No.’ I said, ‘It mine,’ (sic) and forst (sic) it from her. I felt bad as she chased me but it was done. I said to myself, ‘Never agen (sic).’
Etienne is facing several charges, including third degree robbery, fourth degree grand larceny, and petit larceny. Hopefully he’ll also be get tried for crimes against the English language.
Besides which, Etienne is clearly a massive idiot. Not specifically because he stole from a child, but because he stole a DS Lite. You ain’t gonna get shit for that, son. Enough kids carry iPhones that he could have made some serious bank.
Teen Steals Nintendo DS From A Little Girl To Impress A Girl [HotBloodedGaming]
West Brighton teen stole Nintendo system to impress girl, authorities allege [Silive]
