SpongeBob SquarePants Underpants Slam! on XBLA this Wednesday

There’s only one new Live Arcade release next week, and it’s SpongeBob SquarePants Underpants Slam! (800 Microsoft Points). It should obviously appeal only to children who enjoy the TV show, so there’s really no need to take a virtual dump on it based on that merit alone.

The game’s premise is this: Neptune has lost 99 pairs of underpants and it’s up to you to collect each and every one of ’em. We’ve seen some bizarre collectibles over the years (Banjo Kazooie’s beloved Jinjos for instance), but this is ridiculous. Why any one person would need that many pairs of underwear is beyond me.

In addition to that charming single player experience, there are a couple of 4-player multiplayer modes, one of which is Tag Mode — y’know, like the game you played at recess as a kid.

So which XBLA game is better, SpongeBob SquarePants Underpants Slam! or Shrek-N-Roll? To quote the movie poster for Alien vs. Predator, “whoever wins … we lose.”