Push it real good: Game devs talk sex, reveal where babies come from

Nerve.com — the Internet’s answer to the cosmopolitan ideal women have created for people based on televised philosophies exuded by Sarah Jessica Parker’s Harpy Attack Force Alpha — stumbled upon the strikingly brilliant idea of asking video game devs for sex advice. After all, who knows sex better than people who stereotypically have never seen a breast, and who still believe me every time I mention the sideways orientation of Japanese cooters?

That said, the information they give is pretty spot on. Nerve hit up two chaps from Red Fly Studios and a chap and chapette from Zombie Andy Warhol’s favorite dev house Kokoromi, and while most of what they say is common sense, they touch on topics ranging from gigantic dildos to banging the roomie; important info that every young bachelor and bachelorette needs to know before the trials of the opposite sex drive them to drink, or stab white folks in the hopes of getting off due to innate racial tensions.

Sure, it’s not exactly coverage of the Teapot Dome Scandal, but if you’re tired of hearing about that damn blue hedgehog and feel the need to find out what the people behind this think of your slutty exhibitionist girlfriend, you’ve now got the link.

[Propers to N’Gai]

Earnest Cavalli
I'm Nex. I used to work here but my love of cash led me to take a gig with Wired. I still keep an eye on the 'toid, but to see what I'm really up to, you should either hit up my Vox or go have a look at the Wired media empire.