Now that I found you, Carly Rae Jepsen tabletop game, I’m complete

Steal her 200 unreleased songs, my heart

I’m going to tell you a quick story of the biggest regret of my life. About three years ago now Carly Rae Jepsen rolled into town at a really cool local venue. Obviously, I was super excited because she’s the greatest being alive. I went online to buy the tickets, saw they were a steal at $25 apiece, and went through the website’s process.

To my horror, TicketMaster showed its ugly face. Two tickets for $50 is a no-brainer for CRJ, but TicketMaster tried charging me an additional $33 in service fees for the luxury of buying concert tickets. Distressed and heartbroken, I ultimately decided that while I wanted to see my girl more than anything on Earth, I couldn’t justify giving those thieving shits at TicketMaster damn near the cost of two tickets.

I didn’t go see Carly Rae that night, and it’s haunted me ever since.

Luckily, the hero we need, but not necessarily the one we deserve, took it upon himself to create a tabletop game based around Canada’s finest. Boy Problems is here from creator Colin Cummings to lead players on the most fabulous heist of all time: To steal Carly Rae Jepsen’s 200 unreleased tracks from some rich dick hoarding them all for himself.

So that @carlyraejepsen-themed heist tabletop RPG based on @john_harper‘s “Lasers + Feelings” I was talking about making? I made it. https://t.co/jKiF5pXyaF pic.twitter.com/EKH78Jh1sY

— Colin Cummings (@colinmcummings) March 3, 2019

Based on another popular tabletop RPG LASERS + FEELINGS, this futuristic espionage romp sees players take on the role of a member of a crew hired to infiltrate the vault of a rich collector to liberate the veritable goldmine of music within. Many of your expected TTRPG elements, including lucky rolls, sabotage, and all-around ingenuity are included, but this time with a far more important prize should you complete your task. 

You can check out the official rules and artwork here. I don’t know you, Colin, but just know that I really, really, really, really, really, really like you.

[Thanks to my main man Siddartha85 for the tip. Call me, maybe?]