New European Splatfest to put fans in a pickle

For the first time in a long time, Pearl is wrong

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This coming weekend will see European players do battle on Nintendo’s Switch shooter Splatoon 2. Once again, two sides will battle it out for 24 hours to answer the questions that keep the world turning and, once again, we return to the topic of food.

This time around, it’s a question of gherkins and burgers. As in, do you prefer your burger with or without slices of the sour, pickled vegetable? Adorable gremlin Pearl is all like “Hold off on the gherkins there, pal” whereas her disc-spinning buddy Marina is saying “Yeah man, pile that shit on”. For ease, the two teams will simply be known as “Disgusting” and “Delicious”

I never thought I’d hear myself say this, but this time, Pearl is mistaken. The sharp tang of gherkin is a perfect offset to the smoked-essence of a burger. I was the guy who would take everyone else’s unwanted gherkin and add them to my own burger. I’m more gherkin than man, but I wonder where you stand…

The Battle of the Gherkin will take place on Splatoon 2 Saturday, February 10, at 15:00 CET, running until the same time on Sunday.


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Chris Moyse
Senior Editor - Chris has been playing video games since the 1980s and writing about them since the 1880s. Graduated from Galaxy High with honors. Twitter: @ChrisxMoyse