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Unapologetically, I am the farthest thing from a professional Halo player as they come. It’s not uncommon to find me participating in games of “Slayer” where my outcome is a negative number. But I’m really, really good at Tetris, and I’ve finished God of War on “God Mode.”

So when Newsweek‘s N’Gai Croal told us he was doing a photo essay entitled “My First Kill in Halo 3” for the Level Up blog, I knew I had my work cut out for me. I’d be lucky if I ever had any kills at all, much less a first kill. I had even considered hiring one of those first-person shooter “trainers”; you know, one of those 12-year-old kids who makes $75 an hour showing people where the best sniper positions on Zanzibar are.

But I dove right in, and by some miracle, I actually managed to kill some poor sap. Sorry, dude — now you’re Internet famous. While the Level Up team chose to use an image of the kill from my perspective, I think things were a little bit more interesting on the other side. Hit the jump for the full postcard, and the “previously unpublished” gruesome photo of my first kill. 

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