Let’s all come together to mock the hilariously shitty official Sonic movie poster

The Fast and the Furriest

Sonic the Hedgehog runs a lot and he runs very fast. Thus, it would stand to reason that his legs are probably pretty strong. Great news: The official movie poster gave Sonic some absolutely jacked legs, which we’ve just established is entirely within the realm of possibility.

Just kidding, they suck a lot. IGN had an exclusive on the movie poster reveal (embedded above), which is like being in charge of telling everyone that a relative died. Also, the relative was horribly disfigured in death.

Like, what is happening with this weird anthropomorphic take on Sonic? Why does he need these human proportions? He’s a CGI hedgehog. His classic skinny legs would not be more off-putting than this deranged shredded version. The children are going to cry.

If we try very hard to focus on the positives, the poster is extremely dark and maybe Sonic will look better in the light. I mean, probably not but maybe! This is a nightmare and the movie is going to be a disaster. We all know it in our heart of hearts. Hey, at least Detective Pikachu looks cool as hell!

Brett Makedonski
While you laughing, we're passing, passing away. So y'all go rest y'all souls, 'Cause I know I'ma meet you up at the crossroads. Y'all know y'all forever got love from them Bone Thugs baby...