LAWL: Halo Covenant Energy Sword for $44 on Amazon

Wow. This is a real thing. Amazon lists a Halo Covenant Titanium Color Energy Sword for $44, marked down from the list price of $99.99, sold by Top Swords. Hey, there’s only five left in stock — order soon!

This is a real (not real) 27″ Energy Sword, Type-1, made of heat-treated stainless steel, giving fans their own IRL version of the much loved close-quarters melee Halo weapon, complete with an ABS plastic handle. “It is favored by Sangheili and it’s more dangerous than its ceremonial nature implies,” says the item listing.

Also, a wooden wall plaque is included.

If you’re going to be silly and really order this thing, don’t hang it on the wall. Jab people with it. Make ’em bleed. One reviewer on Amazon said that this sword “can EASILY penetrate flesh.” Right. If you’re worried about killing, maybe you could do what another reviewer did:

My 11 year old son wanted this halo sword and so we ordered it and I was a little shocked when we got it. It is definitely a real sword. It is EXTREMELY sharp and dangerous for children. Now I know why it wasn’t sold in stores. My son loves it still, because it is great quality. We had to put duct tape all along the sharp edges and thank goodness they already had the points at the ends covered with very sturdy plastic that we left on.

Are you sold on it now? Order this Energy Sword here.

Dale North