In honor of Enter the Wu-Tang’s 25th anniversary, we ran these 25 characters through the Wu-Tang name generator

As compiled by me, Vizual Pupil

If you ask an old, white person if rap music is real music, they’ll probably say no. They’ll probably say something like, “What rap did that was impressive was to show there are so many tone-deaf people out there,” which is what Rolling Stones guitarist and human ShamWow for drugs Keith Richards said just a few years ago. But as Destructoid’s preeminent rap aficionado — I own three Macklemore albums — I say that shit is whack (Is it still cool to say “whack” in 2018?).

Rap music the soul of a generation. Nah, generations. Songs about surviving in the streets, selling drugs to make ends meet, and busting a cap in some suckas while they played dice really spoke to me as a white child growing up in a protected, middle-class household in the suburbs. I mean, it’s like Scarface was singing about my life when he rapped, “Boy you should have known not to fuck with me bitch, brothers like me are making mortuaries rich.”

Now, Destructoid doesn’t touch on rap and hip-hop too much as the tincture of our writing staff is a shade brighter than White Opulence on a Benjamin Moore color swatch, but this is a big fucking month for the genre. November marks the 25th anniversary of Queen Latifah’s Black Reign, Snoop Dogg’s Doggystyle, and today, November 9, is the silver anniversary of Enter The Wu-Tang (36 Chambers). It’s one of the greatest hip-hop albums of all time, and as this is a gaming website, there are really only two ways to honor it: 1) An all-day stream of Def Jam Vendetta (which featured Wu-Tang founders Ghostface  Killah and Method Man), or 2) Do the lazy thing and run 25 video game characters, one for each year since the album’s been released, through the Wu-Tang name generator. As there is no Twitch stream below, I obviously went with the option two.

From 1994’s Tekken

From 1995’s Phantasy Star IV

From 1996’s Resident Evil

From 1997’s Fallout

From 1998’s Metal Gear Solid

From 1999’s Silent Hill

From 2000’s Deus Ex 

From 2001’s Animal Crossing

From 2002’s Sly Cooper and the Thievius Raccoonus

From 2003’s Dead or Alive Xtreme Beach Volleyball

From 2004’s Grand Theft Auto: San Andreas

From 2005’s Psychonauts

From 2006’s Bully

From 2007’s The World Ends with You

From 2008’s No More Heroes

From 2009’s Brütal Legend

From 2010’s Alan Wake

From 2011’s Temple Run

From 2012’s Kid Icarus: Uprising

From 2013’s Grand Theft Auto V

From 2014’s Danganronpa 2: Goodbye Despair

From 2015’s Her Story

From 2016’s Overwatch

From 2017’s Persona 5

From 2018’s Red Dead Redemption 2

About The Author
CJ Andriessen
Editor-at-Large – CJ has been a contributor to Destructoid since 2015, originally writing satirical news pieces before transitioning into general news, features, and other coverage that was less likely to get this website sued.
More Stories by CJ Andriessen