Hey kids, don’t take any fake Nintendo-branded ecstasy you’re offered

Or any ecstasy, for that matter

Listen up, youths of the world. Gather ’round as Excellent Role Model Brett gives you a lesson on the cold, hard realities of life.

Sometimes you might find yourself with all your friends in a really cool club in England having a great night. That’s awesome. “Viva la Macclesfield, Cheshire!” as the saying goes. But, if anyone offers you a Nintendo-branded pill and tells you that you’ll have an even better time, don’t trust them.

You see, that pill won’t give you the happy moments like when you play Duck Hunt for hours on end. No, it’ll make you “roll” for hours on end, because that pill was ecstacy and you just did drugs and drugs are bad. And, Nintendo most certainly does not endorse illicit amphetamine use, so you can be sure that these tricksters are using fake branding because they’re caught up in their trickster ways.

Unfortunately, it’s probably an inevitability that you’ll eventually be offered drugs, so when that moment presents itself, calmly reply “Destructoid is MY anti-drug!” Everyone will know what you mean, and, more importantly, they’ll respect you far more than if you popped their dumb pills.

Nintendo pills: Three teenagers rushed to hospital after consuming super-strength ecstasy tablets [Mirror via NeoGAF]

Brett Makedonski
While you laughing, we're passing, passing away. So y'all go rest y'all souls, 'Cause I know I'ma meet you up at the crossroads. Y'all know y'all forever got love from them Bone Thugs baby...