Fun for the whole family: Cornholing comes to the Wii

A popular college pastime will soon come to video game consoles.

Thus begins The Lantern’s article on Incredible Technologies’ game version of Ohio’s noble pastime of “cornholing”. Armed with only a vague knowledge of the strange rituals conducted by the denizens of middle(ish) America and a widely accepted definition for cornholing, I expected a whole different ball game.

Sadly, Nintendo isn’t abandoning its trend of family-friendly shovelware for the Wii in favor of horrible deviant-friendly shovelware. Instead of a game in which the Wiimote is put to nauseating use, Incredible Technologies is releasing Target Toss Pro: BAGS, which, in spite of its potentially questionable title, has nothing to do with forced penetration, corn-based or otherwise. 

Answering the questions nobody asked, Andy Kniaz, executive director of Incredible Technologies, explained why they were making a game about throwing a bag of corn through a hole, “Our designers basically realized there’s no reason why you couldn’t really make a video game of it.” An astute observation to be sure, but one that doesn’t address why you wouldn’t “make a video game of it.”

Aside from the endlessly entertaining “throw the object through the hole” gameplay Target Toss Pro: BAGS brings to the table, it will also reportedly feature “Vegas BAGS” mode, in which players are given a card out of a 52-card deck for every shot made attempting to construct the best poker-hand possible. It’s worth noting that “Vegas BAGS” is also a term with two very dissimilar meanings, and one which I would heartily advise you refrain from using should you find yourself in negotiations with a Vegas hooker.

[Thanks, Jonathan!]

Qais Fulton