England hates BioShock, loves FIFA 08: 2007’s UK sales chart is blasphemy

The UK overall sales chart of 2007 has been released, and it shows a few interesting notes, a few obvious points and at least one absolute instance of complete and utter fail. Topping the chart was, predictably, FIFA 08, since most British males are beer guzzling, skinheaded racists who follow the boring sport of football like it was some kind of religion. It’s for this reason that PES 2008 is also in the top ten, because one game about football just isn’t enough, damn it!

The full list is as follows:

1: FIFA 08 (1,391,435)
2: Dr Kawashima’s Brain Training (1,016,558)
3: Call Of Duty 4: Modern Warfare (935,044)
4: PES 2008 (787,382)
5: More Brain Training From Dr Kawashima (760,225)
6: Halo 3 (735,176)
7: The Simpsons Game (734,595)
8: Wii Play (688,002)
9: Assassin’s Creed (670,286)
10: WWE Smackdown VS Raw 2008 (563,121)

The complete lack of BioShock is disappointing to say the least, insulting to say the worst. The very idea that TWO Brain Training games can get in and yet one of the most artistic undertakings of the last year can’t is saddening. Wait … not it’s not, that’s to be expected, actually, and it’s naive to think otherwise. Foolish heathens. I hope my fellow countrymen enjoy their football and brain training … which is a very ironic  contrast indeed.

The final interesting point is Call of Duty 4: Modern Warfare hitting the number three spot way above Halo 3 at number six. I personally thought CoD4 wiped the floor with Halo 3, especially in multiplayer, so that’s pretty encouraging. It may also be to do with the fact that it was released on the PS3 as well, and let’s face it, what else is a PS3 owner going to buy? Most of the Brits probably bought it so they could shoot people from other countries. That is, after all, the typical football fan’s dream. 

Not even a sign of The Orange Box though … for shame.

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James Stephanie Sterling
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