The Detroit Free Press has a (hilarious) story about Joel Zumaya, a pitcher for the Detroit Tigers. People all over the world know Detroit as a city fuelled by heavy industry, hard rock and gang violence, but apparently the Detroit Tigers are fuelled by other opiates; video games!
Mr. Zumaya (or, Zoomie, as he’s known to only me) contracted a recurring inflammation of the right wrist and forearm that doctors originally assumed was caused either by furious masturbation, or that sport that he gets paid to play. Turns out that all of their medical degrees and all of the king’s men were totally wrong, as his injury, it has been learned, was caused by Guitar Hero.
Joel “I Just Wanna Zoom A Zoom Zoom In Your Boom Boom” Zumaya isn’t the first athlete to be sidelined with video game related injuries, either. In the last year, the Cleveland Cavalier’s LeBron James missed 3 games due to a severe cramp he received from extended play of Donkey Konga, and who can ever forget the heartbreaking 1992 NBA Championship series where the Chicago Bulls swept the Portland Trailblazers due to an outbreak of “Pacman Fever”?