An excerpt from Gaming And You: The Ephemeral Line Between Being A Huge Nerd And Scoring Mad Tail, by Beverly Cleary, published by Scholastic Books, 1994, all rights reserved:
” … and then it was over. With a sudden thump, the rocket impacted my chest, sending gibs flying across the entire level, and with them, my dreams of professional gaming stardom. Jeanne would never look at me again, not even with that freaky lazy eye of hers.
Leaving the auditorium that day was like walking through World 1-2 of Super Mario Bros. It was cold, lonely, and every time I thought it couldn’t get any worse, a white squid landed on my head. That was the loneliest day of my life.”
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Nex is a guy who finds these sort of post-article informational blurbs to be incredibly pretentious. Considering he once spent the better part of a weekend drawing penises on the dust jackets of every copy of Atlas Shrugged in the cavernous halls of Powell’s Books, the man knows a lil’ somethin’ about pretension.
We play games!
We knit socks!
Here’s what we’ve been playing!
Also cocks!
Colette Bennett:
BioShock, Taiko Drum Masters, Final Fantasy 1, and Rhythm Tengoku. Also, I’m playing I’m on Eternal Vacation in Miami which is really a blast.
Dick McVengeance:
I’ve been splitting my time between blasting through Castlevania: Harmony of Dissonance (90% on both castles in a few days), and Mercenaries for the PS2. I’m enjoying the fact that the game is like GTA in that I can go and blow shit up, but with less needless stereotypes. It’s just fun, and I actually accomplish something if I just sit down for 20 minutes and play. Also, I’ve started to sink my teeth into Doki Doki Majo Shinpan. Fun times await!
Nick Chester:
Metroid Prime 3 (Wii), Two Worlds (360), SSX Blur (Wii), Carnival Games (Wii), Super Puzzle Fighter HD (360), and isn’t that enough? God.
Grim:
Super Puzzle Fighter II HD and the Call of Duty 4 beta. Based on what I’ve seen in the beta, CoD4 will most likely be the best FPS (for multiplayer) to come out this year.
Rev Anthony:
Making my way through The Pandora Directive and trying not to open a major vein over the amount of disk-swapping involved. When not doing that, I’m going to replay BioShock for a third time.
Tristero:
I’m wading knee-deep through the waters of Metroid Prime 3: Corruption. I’ve been one of the biggest evangelizers for the game since I first played it at E3 2006. It’s the reason I bought a Wii, so I’m nervously tip-toeing through it, seeing if it stacks up to the unrealistic expectations I set for it. I’m also sneaking in a few quick matches of Bomberman Live here and there. My wife and I played against my brother and his wife yesterday. Family bonding.
Aaron Linde:
Hungary has no games. No arcades, no nothing. I think I’m the only person in this goddamn country that has a DS, and that frightens and disturbs me.
I’m not playing Metroid Prime 3 or Super Puzzle Fighter II HD Remix, and that blows. But I am playing Jeanne D’Arc on my PSP, which as it turns out is probably the best title yet on Sony’s little paperweight.
Leigh Alexander:
Taking my time with BioShock. I find that I’m approaching it like a survival horror game and not like an FPS, probably because I have played way way more of the former and hardly any of the latter; I dig into every corner and look at EVERYTHING. And I am making POKEMAN BABIES.
Also, Knytt Stories, which is one of those cases where if you never heard of it you don’t know what you’re missing. Nifflas’ work is so rad.
Nex:
Aside from taking Leigh’s advice and masturbating furiously all over everything Nifflas has ever done, most of my gaming this week actually occurred during last weekend’s PAX.
I played Rock Band, passed out from how utterly amazing it was, then woke up drunk as a stone, playing Time Crisis 3 in Seattle’s Gameworks. Thankfully, the next day, I awoke sober as a stone and spent the day splitting my time between smoking like a race horse with a nicotine monkey for a jockey and the shockingly good John Deere: Harvest in the Heartland. None of you are actually going to buy it, but I’ve always assumed you were all idiots anyway.
BlindsideDork:
Surprisingly I haven’t been able to speed through Metroid Prime 3: Corruption as I did with BioShock. Since I am about 15 hours in and 86% done (collected?), it will be completed this weekend. There is no other game but this one to me right now.
Gameboi:
Thanks to Metroid Prime: Corruption, I finally have a good reason to fire up the Wii again. Sadly, it has been unplugged and living a lonely existence next to my Xbox 360 and Xbox for far too long. In other news, I’ve been doing the BioShock thing as well, which by the way, has brought me joy on a level that I haven’t felt since first playing Resident Evil several years ago. If you were to drop me off on a deserted island (with electricity?) with a 360 and but five games to keep me busy, BioShock would be one of them.
Dale North:
As my Xbox 360 was just sent out in its coffin, I found myself picking up Super Puzzle Fighter II HD for the PS3. At first I was worried that there would be less competition, but I was wrong. There’s always a match waiting, and everyone is damned good! One of my rounds lasted 26 minutes last night, and when I finally dominated with a brilliant 4-chain, I let out a victory cry that could be heard for miles. It still doesn’t take away the sting of missing BioShock, though.
Jim Sterling:
As most of the regular readers know by now, I’m in Mississippi right now (renamed Monoclesippi while I’m here, naturally), far away from my games. A Destructoid editor is never beat, however, and I’ve managed to get in some play with Silent Hill 2, my favorite game of all time. I also watched two genuine Americans playing co-op Dynasty Warriors Gundam in a Gamestop. Your Gamestops are not as good as our Gamestations, unfortunately. I love your biscuits, though.
Chad Concelmo:
I know I almost overuse this saying more than “I love dolphins,” but this really has been the BEST WEEK EVER! I am showering myself in BioShock, Metroid Prime 3: Corruption, Super Metroid, and The Legend of Zelda: A Link to the Past. Seriously, it doesn’t get any better than this.
Faith:
Well, since I went to X’07 I’ve played The Simpsons, Stranglehold, Black Site: Area 51, Crash Bandicoot: Crash of the Titans, Half Life 2: Episode 2, Rock Band, Thrillville and LEGO Star Wars. I’ve also been playing Final Fantasy I, Heroes of Mana, Brain Age, and Carcassonne. I think that is the most videogame titles I’ve ever played in one week.
Orcist:
This week, I’m playing through Shadow of the Colossus and finally realizing what all the hubub was about. Believe the hype.
.tiff, sister of .harr:
A dash of Mega Man X here and there. Re-enacting Castle Crashers with my green Castle Crasher toy and my pet cat. Revisiting my golden years of adventure gaming by way of Day of the Tentacle and Sam and Max Hit the Road. And finally, making elaborate costume plans to be Laverne from DOTT in the American flag tentacle outfit for Halloween. Win.
Wasn’t that inspiring? What have you been playing kids? The first one to tell me he/she has been reading all week gets a derisive sneer for mimicking back to me what I just mentioned in an effort to be clever.
Published: Sep 2, 2007 04:19 am