Culture Brain, one of the best-named game publishers of all time, is changing its name

Another example of how progressives ruin everything

Donald Trump once said that his number-one person to speak to about foreign policy is himself, because he has a very good brain. He’s a lot like Jennifer Coolidge’s character from Best in Show in that way, trusting in messages from herself and her “inner instincts” whenever the going gets tough.

As much as Trump loves his own brain, my guess is that he has an even deeper respect for Culture Brain, the developer of such classic franchises as Baseball Simulator and Flying Dragon. Back in the ’80s, when Trump and I were both in our youth, commercials for Baseball Simulator 1000 were broadcast on television on a near continuous cycle, hypnotizing the world into a frothy, baseball-soaked frenzy. My Pet Monster was in everyone’s bed, Vuarnet France sunglasses were on everyone’s head, and Baseball Simulator 1000 was on everyone’s minds, always. It was glorious. 

Sadly, times have changed. Now rebranded as Culture Brain Excel, the company is looking to create games for everyone, including children, and even the elderly. It’s just another example of how modern American culture’s brainless pursuit of inclusivity and the “not-white-men-aged-18-to-35” demographic is ruining everything.

Thanks, Odama

Jonathan Holmes
"Where do dreams end and reality begin? Videogames, I suppose."- Gainax, FLCL Vol. 1 "The beach, the trees, even the clouds in the sky... everything is build from little tiny pieces of stuff. Just like in a Gameboy game... a nice tight little world... and all its inhabitants... made out of little building blocks... Why can't these little pixels be the building blocks for love..? For loss... for understanding"- James Kochalka, Reinventing Everything part 1 "I wonder if James Kolchalka has played Mother 3 yet?" Jonathan Holmes