I’m not a pig, so I won’t blindly say that Mama has found her place in the kitchen. But really — the woman never leaves the kitchen! Well, she does hit the garden now and again, but it seems that she can’t stay away the stove. You need to get out, Mama.
Look, I can appreciate that the franchise has done well, and that a third Cooking Mama was probably a good idea, but give the woman a break. Let her get out. Let her meet a man that can enjoy her cooking. Hell, she doesn’t even need to cook – she has all of us doing that for her! No, she should seriously go out — but do something about that hair first. Jesus.
Cooking Mama 3 will have 80 new recipes and 200 minigames that Mama can use as an excuse to stay in and not meet a man. There’s also a new four-player multiplayer, but knowing Mama, it’ll be played with three other homely housewomen.
Mama, you can only hide so long before you dry up and become an old maid. Your cooking isn’t that good. I get that you have a new game coming out this Christmas. Maybe you could dress up and go out for New Years. You’re not getting any younger, you know.