Contest: Become Mr. Destructoid for an hour at PAX

The excitement at Destructoid HQ is bubbling like dynamite in my grandma’s toilet, as PAX is just three weeks away! There are a ton of people planning on going from the Dtoid Community, and we have a surprise to share with you for all of you guys and gals going to PAX on Friday. We’re going to be busy running around on Friday, so we have a special yob for anyone that’s interested doing something unusual.

Be Mr. Destructoid for an hour. Yup. Best job ever.

All you need to do to become Mr. Destructoid is call dibs in the comments below and meet us at a secret location to arrange costume logistics and wacky pose training. YOU MUST HAVE NO SHAME, DECENT COORDINATION, A STRONG NECK, AND AN IRON-LIKE FOREHEAD. The helmet weighs about ten pounds and has a built-in iPod that plays a video game mix through a built-in internal speaker for maximum peyote effect, as well as batteries and LED lights. However, seniority will be granted to long-time members of Dtoid (and people who actually show up on time!). It is preferred that you wear a suit if you’re not going to fit in Niero’s 5’1″1 170-pound sexy pants. You too, ladies. We don’t discriminate, but we’ll get you out of that dress and do you up like Hefner. The silliest person we can find may be asked to do something special at our PAX panel.

What does Mr. Destructoid do? Mostly grope people. You’ll be taking turns with your fellow Dtoiders for an hour each as you ham it up, take photos with people and do things that will make you question your sexuality.

Everyone that helps out by becoming Mr. Destructoid will get one of our new “Become” T-Shirts and a neck rub. The PAX show hours haven’t been released yet, but the gig is only for an hour at a time, and you’ll be asked to sign a waiver that you totally love possible brain damage and whiplash.

Until then, go call dibs!

Hamza Aziz