The hyperlinked shout-out from space
Howdy there my fellow fellers. Today’s Comments of the Week is brought to you by this old man from 1992’s Phalanx box art and yours truly, ZombZ. This is my first go at this and I’m hoping to do this beloved blog series justice, like FakePlasticTree, TheLimoMaker and Gmana have done before me these past three weeks. I’m glad they tested the waters for me first, although I’m a little concerned, because from growing up, I remember being the fourth person to hop into a bathtub doesn’t really make you feel all that great. Well, moving on.
As always here comes the funny and/or insightful stuff you’ve thrown out into the vast emptiness of the internet. Okay. Some of the stuff you’ve thrown out. No, some of the stuff, some of you have thrown out. Actually, very little of what you, as a collective, have written. Well, moving on.
ZombZ: We should do away with traditional reviewing systems. All a potential buyer needs to know is if there are well-labeled holes, and how many.
ZombZ: You people disgust me. Now excuse me while I stuff my face with deep fried Mars bars.
ZombZ: Ve are one with ze tuna.
ZombZ: I think there’s an ointment for that. Not that I’d know.
ZombZ: Because Nintendo under-supplies. Get it? Get it? … I ruined it, didn’t I?
ZombZ: Robust robutt sales.
ZombZ: Get out now! Then come back with more of that please.
ZombZ: The next Far Cry will be about Shadow1’s revenge on Dere.
ZombZ: Both of those are better than the, “Buy this or we kill your franchise,” line. Looking at you Fed Force.
ZombZ: Comment: On comment: Yes.
ZombZ: We have very strict rules around here.
ZombZ: This had me giggling all week. Thanks again you beautiful man.
ZombZ: For science! Keep up the good work brother/sister/mother/lover.
ZombZ: It’s probably faster than setting up this mess.
ZombZ: PR BS at its best, folks!
ZombZ: I have a very strong urge to see Sam Elliot with heavy eyeliner.
ZombZ: The devices are actually quite different. GO‘s GPS tracking ensures that you actually go outside and walk. The Pikachu Tamagochi thingy was more about preparing your feeble arm muscles for puberty.
ZombZ: Someone give this man a job.
ZombZ: I think it’s past your bedtime… slime, rime, enzyme, prime, climb, grime.
ZombZ: Yeah…that’s where I’d put my Switch too, IF I HAD ONE!
ZombZ: This would be so much better without context…
Â ZombZ: You can’t see it, but what’s actually featured here is our resident moderator staff.
ZombZ: Thanks. Now I can’t get the USSR anthem out of my head whenever I see the game’s title.
ZombZ: Heh. Weebs.
Boom. Done. You may have noticed that you weren’t featured this week (unless you were) and there’s good reason for that. I rolled a die and your number didn’t come up. That might seem unfair, but so is life. At least your wife didn’t run off to Hawaii with some doctor named Bob. You might not know kung-fu, have a job, or have a full set of teeth, but she could at least let you see the kids on Christmas.
Well, moving on.
Tune in next week, when Lawman takes us by the hand and leads us further into the abyss.
See you in space, cowboys.
PS: I’d like to apologize to Destructoid for stealing their mascot Mr. Destructoid and to Bethesda for stealing the Vault Boy images. I’m not really sorry, but I heard this is what you’re supposed to do when you blatantly plagiarize someone else’s work. This is mine now. He’s called Mr. Cothew. That’s an acronym. Because I’m smart.