BioShock 2 has ‘intense violence’ and ‘f*cking sodomites’

That’s what we like to hear! The ESRB has rated BioShock 2, and like so many other ESRB ratings, it has made the game sound positively splendid. Summarizing the game’s “intense acts of violence,” the ratings board has talked about drills, blood, and “fantastical” corpse harvesting.

Here’s what the ESRB has to say about 2K’s upcoming underwater shooter:

Intense acts of violence are as follows: players can use telekinesis to bring enemies close-up before drilling them to death—blood splatters in all directions; players can freeze enemies and allow them to shatter into pieces; players can set fire to enemies, or electrocute them in standing pools of water. In addition to the spurts of blood from combat, players will sometimes encounter smears of blood on walls and floors, and corpses lying in pools of blood—or spiked onto walls with rivets. When players come across a “special” corpse, they may set down the Little Sister and allow her to harvest ADAM (a DNA-modifying substance); the depiction of a child-like creature using a needle to draw fluid from a corpse can be somewhat unsettling (though overtly fantastical).

However, it’s the “sexual content” described in the game that brings the most laughs:

Consumers may wish to know that the game contains minor sexual content. While exploring Rapture’s Red Light District, players can overhear conversations alluding to prostitution (e.g., “Hello there, how much? . . . Twenty bills and I’m all yours, sailor.”); players may also see a variety of ads and signs for strip clubs (e.g., “Eve’s Garden XXX”)—these brief scenarios contribute to the Sexual Themes descriptor (i.e., the violence and profanity account for the Mature rating). The game includes frequent use of strong profanity (e.g., “f**k,” “motherf**ker,” and “c*nt”) and some lesser four-letter words (e.g., “sh*t” and “tw*t”); in one instance, an enemy attacks Delta while screaming, “F**king sodomites everywhere!” [italics added]

Oh, those cheeky sodomites. What will they get up to next? Seriously though, the ESRB has just made this game sound like even more of a “DO WANT” buy for me. Yes, I like games with swearing and violence in them. Only a f*cking sodomite would disagree.

Jim Sterling