Gearbox: Great things afoot for Colonial Marines

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Gearbox may be hard at work on Borderlands, but the team hasn’t forgotten that other shooter it’s working on. The one involving double-mouthed, phallic-headed space-rapists. News on Aliens: Colonial Marines has been so sparse that Gearbox has had to continually assure us it’s still in the works, but according to boss Randy Pitchford, the wait for information will be worth it.

“I want to tell all, but I can’t,” explains Pitchford. “I can say that we are working hard and that there are great things afoot and I know that when the time is right, Sega will be excited to share more details about the game. Until that time, I guess the only thing anyone can do is just keep pressuring Gearbox and Sega to spill more beans. Maybe one of us will eventually crack.

“… I can imagine that there are a LOT of Aliens fans out there just like me that feel we’ve been waiting for our true Aliens game since we first saw the film and now that we know it’s in development, we want it NOW!”

I have Pitchford’s email. I guess if he’s just invited me to bombard him with photographs of myself in the nude until he finally surrenders all the juicy gossip, then this is something I must do for the good of my readers. JOURNALISM has to be done! 

Please let this game be good. I love Aliens more than I love cake, and I’m fat. You do the math.


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