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#Destructoid Golden Archives


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The tragic history of the videogame turkey

[From our Destructoid Golden Archives, here's a Chad Concelmo classic from this day in Dtoid, 2009] The other day I was driving down the street, when a large feather from a rusty white truck transporting turkeys blew into my Jeep window. Af...

 
 
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Blast from the past: Destructoid's Mega Man Maker

This little app was originally published during PAX 2008 during a panel we gave about how important it is to create original content when starting your own gaming site. The music was made by Dale North, and all of the sprite art by the...

 
 
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I want to have sex with Carmen Sandiego

[Originally published on Destructoid back in 2006! Some photos were lost/replaced, otherwise minor edits made. A Burch classic! For dumb people: this is satire - Niero.] 3D-Rendered, big-buxomed women with identical blank stares do absolute...

 
 
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Why Ekans is the best Pokemon

[Published in 2010, this classic Destructoid moment from Jim delivers the facts you need today.  - Niero] There are almost 500 Pokémon in the world, and that's a lot. With so many unique and varied pocket monsters out ...

 
 
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Hot Mess: 10 Years of Destructoid party photos

There's something about the Mr. Destructoid helmet that brings out the animal in people. I've seen sheepish tiny McChicken-like boys turn into fearless crotch-thrusters, running up on stages and doing what three shots of Jager could not aff...

 
 
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10 Years of Destructoid: Get krunk with Mr. Destructoid

[This article was originally published in 2010 -- We miss you, Hollie!] It is a well known fact that a large percentage of the Destructoid community likes to drink. I may or may not have been escorted home drunk by Niero at PAX in fact. S...

 
 
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Holiday music to jam to with your gaming family

Happy holidays, HAPPY HOLIDAYS!  It is that time of year when you annoy entertain your family, friends, neighbors, co-workers, and unsuspecting opponents on Xbox Live with your holiday music. As a professional at annoying entertai...

 
 
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Videogame characters that look like David Bowie

[From our Golden Archives: here's our most popular story of the day back in 2009. -N] David Bowie, born David Robert Jones on January 8, 1947, is an English musician, actor, producer and arranger. Having been active in the entertainment ind...

 
 
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Why the Super Mario movie is an underappreciated masterpiece

[Ed. note: El Great Burcho published this on February 2007. It's one of our Golden favorites.] No, I'm not being ironic, or corny, or funny. Neither am I drunk, stoned, nor under the influence of outside forces requiring me to like the Supe...

 
 
 
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Where are they now? Ex-Destructoid editors in the biz

As some of you may have heard by now, Dale North (our editor in chief from 2010-2014) will be moving on to sunnier, though less 'toidy skies. You can read that announcement here. It's no secret that Dale and I have definitely punched each ...

 
 
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100% Series Retrospective: The Legend of Zelda

[Want to read about every Zelda game in this daunting quest by Chris? Check out the first ever Carter's Quest entry. -N] Halfway through beating Ocarina of Time 3D, I had a pretty neat thought: I decided that in honor of Zelda's 25th annive...

 
 
 
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Citizens, unite: vote Mike Haggar

[Another gem from Destructoid's Golden Archives, this our most popular story of April 2008] As you’ve no doubt been following the prospective U.S. presidential nominees, you must be asking yourself several questions: Who should I...

 
 
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Ten golden rules of online gaming

[Destructoid turns 7 next week! Here's our most popular article from January 2009, one of Jim's first features. Check out more of our earlier works in our Golden Archives. -Niero] People have been hunched over their PCs, firing rockets into...

 
 
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The ten most meaningful videogame quotes of all time

[This month, Destructoid turns 7 years old! Here's the top article of this weekend back in 2008. You can browse more of these in our Golden Archives. Nostalgic yet? -Niero] Call me a weakling, but it's been more or less forever since I last...

 
 
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Six sinister things about Super Mario

[Destructoid turns 7 on March 16, 2013! I'm celebrating early by repairing some of my favorite articles from our Wordpress days. You'll be able to browse this original collection soon -- "Destructoid's Golden Archives" is hereby instituted ...

 
 
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From our community  

Ramblings of a colorblind gamer

You may or may not know that I am red-green colorblind. Money looks grey to me, pink looks white, brown looks green. No big thing. Since I was born colorblind, I have no frame of reference for how the world is "supposed" to look and, theref...

 
 
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Videogames that make you feel godly

Videogames provide the perfect tools for pure escapism or utter powerlessness. As a fully interactive media, the player can be as involved as the developer in the fate of our characters, or we can be utterly impotent in swaying our destiny,...

 
 
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The REAL top ten games of the decade

You've doubtless read by now the "official" top ten games of the decade, or indeed any of the top ten game lists that have spilled onto the Internet as the so-called "naughties" ends and 2010 ushers in yet another arbitrarily assigned ten-y...

 
 
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Rev Rant: Donate

Every week, "Reverend" Anthony Burch talks about aspects of game design and gamer culture in his weekly "Rev Rant" video series. Admittedly, this week's rant turned out a lot more angry and weirdly serious than the other ones I've done -- ...

 
 
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How Killzone 2 is blatantly better than Halo 3

Killzone 2 launched exclusively for the PlayStation 3 this Friday, generating much bias from biased people who are biased. It also sold quite a few copies and has been setting the PlayStation Network afire with grenade spam and shotgun ramp...

 
 
 from  our Community Blogs
 
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The Videogame Bosses' Guide to Success

So you aspire to be a roadblock in the path of every hero, a hulking shadow that ominously hangs over the hopes and dreams of normal people, the guy that makes babies squall at your very approach. I know you. You've turned many a pleasant g...

 
 
 from  our Community Blogs
 




Reviews   filter by...

Final Fantasy XV: Episode Ignis"Last time is a charm?"

 

Game of Thrones Season 7 Blu-ray box set and giveaway"Want to own a copy of Game of Thrones s7? Read on!"

 

Race for the Galaxy (Mobile)"One of the best digital conversions to date"

 

Star Wars: The Last Jedi"The Force is strong with this one"

 

Review in Progress: Okami HD"Amaterasu is still lookin' good"

 

7 Wonders (iPad)"Give me that money, Berenice"

 

Puzzle Fighter"A bit of a gem"

 

Wuppo"Wum is the loneliest number"

 
 
 

Community Blogs | expand

 

Quickposts expand | +quickpost

RevolverRick

Believe or not folks, this is a real

 
Chris Moyse

Baaaaad stomach Time to hit the herbal I’m gon be a little quiet over the next couple of days, but you guys remember to have a good weekend x

 
Rad Party God

Okami is still absolutely fucking delightful and its still absolutely fucking I still absolutely fucking love this

 
medicamecanica

Xenoblade 2 has some damn infuriating side They are never ever just the thing that youre asked to do, but actually 5 separate things in a row that will all send you to google if you ever want your reward thats usually not that great

 
JcDent

#succubusworldproblems

 
lokhe

Watched The Last Jedi last The highs are so high, the lows are so Very

 
Electric Reaper

Donald Trump is an asshole and he should be investigated for sexual assault, among other illegal Also, I would ordinarily say consuming 12 cans of Diet Coke is bad for ones physical and mental health, but since its Drumpf, I dont give a

 
absolutfreak

Ive done I finally watched The There was nothing that could have prepared me for how wonderfully terrible the whole experience was, and I have to whole-heartedly recommend it for anyone who has not yet been exposed to Tommy Wiseaus

 
Ricky Namara

In relation to the net neutrality issue, please go to and click the Express link there to let your voice be I hope you will all band together to stop Adjit Pais nefarious agenda once and for

 
 

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