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Which of these looks most like Mii?

Steven Hansen, Features Editor - Destructoid
4:00 PM on 03.27.2015
Which of these looks most like Mii?  photo

There are a lot of weird quirks brought about by existence. One of them is that we all exist in varying relationship to other people, particularly larger than life figures. But larger than life figures aren't even exempt. As a kid, I confused Patrick Swayze and Kurt Russell. I've seen people on Twitter confusing American Republican presidential hopeful Ted Cruz with Grandpa Munster and the Pokemon Muk.

Dale North always said you should never tell someone they look like someone else (a celebrity, most likely), and I agree. It's uncanny at best, insulting at worst. My supposed doppelgangers have spanned Michael Sheen, John Lennon, Charlie Day, Peter Frampton, and Bret McKenzie. Some of you will undoubtedly comment, "You know, I do see some of [one of 'em, or someone else, hopefully Idris Elba]."

It's a weird thing but one of the ways we exist is as people see us, and that can be in relation to other people. Oh what a tangled web, etc. And so here we are, a lot of preamble for me asking you folks (further degrees of separation, let's get wild!) which of my friends made the most accurate Mii of me? (Yes, I just got a Wii U).

Interestingly, they all picked the same hair, because I am a disheveled mess who has been saying, "I should get a haircut" since Thanksgiving, then Christmas, then a trip I took, then GDC. Months.

Mortal Kombat X's TV advert channels the schoolyard spirit

Brett Makedonski, Associate Editor - Destructoid
3:30 PM on 03.27.2015

Who could forget those special playground moments as a child? Maybe you're shootin' hoops are playing kickball, when you hear some kid scream "FIGHT!" at the top of his lungs. You drop everything immediately, because if you don't, the supervisor might break it up before you get there. That'd suck.

This Mortal Kombat X ad is exactly like that. Well, I remember less System of a Down. And, there probably weren't so many adults egging on a pre-adolescent fight club. But, apart from those differences? Spot on.

Friday Night Fights - Bloody Ghost Pillar Towns

Mike Martin, Community Play Manager - Destructoid
3:00 PM on 03.27.2015
Friday Night Fights - Bloody Ghost Pillar Towns photo

Hey everyone. Sick with the flu this week, so please excuse me. This one will be short.

FNF is looking like a ghost town this week and I'm sure that's due to two games that hit this week. Before I launch into that, stop by the new Nintendoid blog and check out Shade and Strider's heir to the old Nintendo FNF blog. Now, about those two games:

Bloodborne is the first of the two. Everyone seems to be quite enjoying it and that's a great thing! If you'd like to have only fellow Dtoiders enter your game, how about everyone set their passwords to bloodtoid or something similar? Our own sexy Fenriff wanted to throw out that suggestion to you folks enjoying the game. I don't have a PS4 or I'd be joining you folks in your werewolf hunting escapades. That's ok though, because I do have.....

Pillars of Eternity, which is the second game seemingly drawing everyone in. I've stayed away from most news regarding this one, but folks sure are raving about it. Hopefully, I feel good enough to get some time with it tonight. I'll at least make a character if nothing else. Now if you folks will excuse me, I need a toilet. Again.

Senran Kafaux pas: Fable dev Lionhead celebrates cleavage on Twitter

Steven Hansen, Features Editor - Destructoid
2:30 PM on 03.27.2015
Senran Kafaux pas: Fable dev Lionhead celebrates cleavage on Twitter photo

[Update: Lionhead tweeted an apology, "We apologise for the imagery we shared earlier. Diversity & inclusion are values we uphold here. We'll reinforce these values w/ our team," irritating a whole new group of people.]

"Happy #NationalCleavageDay from all of us at Lionhead Studios!," the now-deleted Tweet from Fable Legends developer Lionhead read.

Apparently today is "National Cleavage Day," one of the many stupid, made-up holidays some people celebrate, like "Star Wars Day" and "Christmas." Lionhead decided to "celebrate" the day on social media with a "piece [of] Fable II artwork from our archives." Why make up a holiday if it isn't something you can use to get off work? (Apparently because this one started as a marketing tactic by a bra company in South Africa over a decade ago.)

For the sake of double entendre, The Foaming Jugs is the name of a Fable tavern and a reference to the large-breasted woman holding frothing booze. The problem is that she is not even holding jugs, which are liquid-holding containers that commonly narrow at the top and are used for pouring more than drinking. Now, America delineates between jugs and wide-mouthed pitchers, while elsewhere they're all jugs, but a pouring spout is still part of the description. This is more of a tankard or stein, but those are not things (most) people call boobs.

The other problem, of course, is a #brand being cute on Twitter, trying to score social media clout by hopping on a popular hashtag and rifling through its art archives to find promotional material that features a busty woman in low cut garb serving beer. St. Pauli Girl doesn't even show that much skin and that's as bad as beer gets short of Coors distracting people from its yellow water with a multi-million dollar marketing campaign about how cold it is (which, in turn, works better to hide the taste of bad beer).

Anyways, it's Friday so I'm going to go get a Steel Reserve and suggest brands not post suggestive promo art that commodifies women's bodies while I wait on all the glowing praise I deserve for the Senran Kagura headline.

Brush up on all of Metal Gear's history before MGSV: The Phantom Pain comes out

Brett Makedonski, Associate Editor - Destructoid
2:00 PM on 03.27.2015
Brush up on all of Metal Gear's history before MGSV: The Phantom Pain comes out photo

Whether you're a complete newcomer to Metal Gear or a seasoned vet just shooting to glaze over a few things that you probably already know, it's not a bad idea to take a look at this top-secret document. Okay, it doesn't actually contain classified information, but it does feature an expansive history of the Metal Gear series -- something that should serve as a perfect refresher before heading into Metal Gear Solid V: The Phantom Pain.

The 32-page document was written by redditor reeceprocter89 and seemingly hits on the entirety of the Metal Gear timeline, from years preceding the games through events in the present day. It even contains a dictionary to clear up any confusing subjects. How convenient!

Next time you find yourself dreaming about Kojima's created world, pick this up and kill some time. Just make sure to do it before The Phantom Pain so everything's as fresh in your mind as it can possibly be.

Metal Gear Solid: The Complete Story [DocDroid via reddit]


Come on, you didn't think GTA V on PC would look bad, did you?

Brett Makedonski, Associate Editor - Destructoid
1:30 PM on 03.27.2015
Come on, you didn't think GTA V on PC would look bad, did you? photo

While PC users patiently wait to become the last people on earth to play Grand Theft Auto V, they can temporarily sate the need for open-world mayhem with these gorgeous images. Expansive skylines, incredible lighting, detailed scenery -- it's all here and looking better than ever.

Fortunately, the wait isn't a whole lot longer. GTA V comes to PC on April 14. Until then, hold off on all other forms of Grand Theft Auto-ing. You wouldn't want to temper expectations with some lesser version of the game.

We gotta have the funk: ToeJam & Earl funded on Kickstarter

Jordan Devore, Managing Editor - Destructoid
1:00 PM on 03.27.2015
We gotta have the funk: ToeJam & Earl funded on Kickstarter photo

ToeJam & Earl is one of those properties I wasn't sure would ever return, but Kickstarter has a way of bringing back old favorites. This is the final hour of the final day of the campaign for ToeJam & Earl: Back in the Groove, and it's working on stretch goals now. A few have been reached.

While ports to PlayStation 4, Xbox One, and Wii U are seemingly out of the question, at least as far as stretch goals go, the "old-school" character skins for ToeJam and Earl are happening, as is the Hyperfunk Zone. You know the one. The Kickstarter is on the cusp of adding extra playable characters, including Earl's mom, with around $5,000 more needed at the time of writing.

So close!

ToeJam and Earl: Back in the Groove [Kickstarter]

That free Fast & Furious expansion for Forza Horizon 2 is out today photo
That free Fast & Furious expansion for Forza Horizon 2 is out today
by Jordan Devore

More free stuff to download on Xbox One and Xbox 360 assuming you get around to nabbing Forza Horizon 2 Presents Fast & Furious before April 10, at which point the standalone expansion becomes $10. As we said previously, Ludacris is in this so, yeah. Cool.

I'm a couple films behind in the Fast & Furious series, but Furious 7 looks like more dumb fun and the ten cars you'll acquire in this game are based on the new movie. One of the vehicles is an "armored 2013 Jeep Wrangler Unlimited." Hah. Consider that the litmus test.

There's said to be around six to eight hours of gameplay. Good chunk of game, then. Grab it here.

view full story + comments

Sony details gamebreaking Bloodborne bug, fix is on the way

Chris Carter, Reviews Director - Destructoid
11:34 AM on 03.27.2015
Sony details gamebreaking Bloodborne bug, fix is on the way photo

Sony has just sent word to Destructoid regarding a progression-hindering bug for Bloodborne -- I'll be as vague as possible to avoid spoilers. It specifically deals with an item called the Lunarium Key not appearing in an area that is roughly one third of the way through the game.

To spur this bug and halt your progress one must initiate online co-op as a guest (using the Small Resonant Bell) or as a hostile invader (Sinister Resonant Bell) in the Forbidden Woods area. From Software and Sony are working on a hotfix titled 1.02 to combat this, and it's planned for next week. Apparently the load time optimization will not be patched when 1.02 hits, and there's no ETA yet for that fix.

Destiny is getting more bank space soon, but the previous generation is already having memory issues

Chris Carter, Reviews Director - Destructoid
11:00 AM on 03.27.2015
Destiny is getting more bank space soon, but the previous generation is already having memory issues photo

Bungie has detailed what we can expect from an upcoming April update for Destiny, and it's mostly slanted towards extra vault space. Now instead of 20 spots for armor, weapons, and general items all around, that number will increase to 24, 36, and 24 respectively. It'll also gain the ability to utilize the PS4's new suspend/resume feature.

The biggest takeaway from all of this is that the Xbox 360 and PS3 versions are already starting to show their age. Based on the update, the previous generation versions will actually lose a feature, in that you no longer can compare items while in the vault. The issue is due to memory constraints, and that seems to be the real reason why Bungie was hesitant to up bank space for so long -- it needed to optimize for the 360 and PS3.

If so, that's going to be an even bigger issue as time goes on and Destiny gets more complicated.

Microsoft details Xbox One April update, includes dedicated servers for party chat

Chris Carter, Reviews Director - Destructoid
10:30 AM on 03.27.2015

The Xbox One continues to make incremental updates just like the PS4, and although the April update looks rather small, it's welcome. Microsoft is adding in voice messages between Xbox One and 360 owners, dedicated servers for party chat, and a new "what's on" preview area for TV shows and clips.

Dedicated party servers is a pretty huge win for people who play online, as you presumably don't have to worry about dropping connections constantly. Microsoft mentions that users can encounter NAT-issues with specific party members (I get this all the time on the PS4's party chat), and now that should be resolved. You can get a better look at what's in store in the video above.

Steam SEGA Super Bundle gives you $370 worth of games for $80

Steven Hansen, Features Editor - Destructoid
10:00 AM on 03.27.2015
Steam SEGA Super Bundle gives you $370 worth of games for $80 photo

Sega is sailing onto Steam with sales this sweekend.

On this page you'll find a general list of things on sale. It is deceptive because a $2.50 Jet Set Radio or a $6.80 Valkyria Chronicles share as much screen space as the "SEGA Super Bundle." If you click the latter, you'll find, by Steam's math, $370 "worth" of games discounted to $80.

You can call it padded because it reads like the SEGA Genesis Collection with a few big ticket items thrown in (Sonic Generations, Binary Domain, Alpha Protocol). I call it a clever way to sneak copies of classics like Viking: Battle of Asgard and The Club into peoples' Steam libraries. If you were already planning on spending $35 on Football Manager 15, though, this deal is pretty sweet.

Still, even if you just pick and choose the bundles (Dreamcast Collection, $10.50) or individual titles you want (Alien: Isolation, $12.50), there are some cheap games to be had.

Plus, everyone needs to buy Dr. Robotnik's Mean Bean Machine. It's $2.50!

Dragon Ball XenoVerse is getting the new form of Frieza as DLC

Chris Carter, Reviews Director - Destructoid
9:00 AM on 03.27.2015
Dragon Ball XenoVerse is getting the new form of Frieza as DLC photo

Remember when Frieza said that he had changed into his final form on Namek? Well he lied. In the newest Dragon Ball Z movie titled Resurrection 'F', Frieza will be reincarnated as Golden Frieza, taking on the gang once again.

Bandai Namco is taking advantage of this cross-promotion with a new DLC character for Dragon Ball XenoVerse, as well as Jaco from Jaco the Galactric Patrolman. There's also an unannounced character, more quests, more moves, and a few additional costumes involved. Currently all of this is announced only for Japan.

Resurrection 'F' Version Frieza Joins Dragon Ball Xenoverse Game as DLC [Anime News Network]

Sony shutting down Vita RPG Destiny of Spirits

Steven Hansen, Features Editor - Destructoid
8:00 AM on 03.27.2015
Sony shutting down Vita RPG Destiny of Spirits photo

Sony's gotta-catch-'em-all Vita card game Destiny of Spirits will be shut down June 30. Apparently the "over one million downloads" were not enough to sustain the free-to-play Vita title and so Sony will be "ending service."

Destiny of Spirits just released last March. After June 30, you will not be able to access the game, or any of the in-game currency you might've purchased. That, too, will vanish, though Sony will still be selling the in-game currency until June 30 in the Americas and until the end of April in Europe and Asia.

The Vita RPG seems to have lasted just as long as the servers for Sony's MLB 14 The Show, which appear to be going offline on June 18, two and a half months after this year's MLB 15 The Show's release.

From Software's Shadow Tower hits PSN next week

Kyle MacGregor, Associate Editor - Destructoid
7:00 AM on 03.27.2015
From Software's Shadow Tower hits PSN next week photo

Before Bloodborne or even Demon's Souls, From Software created Shadow Tower, another dark action role-playing game, which released for the original PlayStation more than 15 years ago.

According to the latest episode of the PlayStation Blogcast, the venerable RPG is slated for a revival on PlayStation Network next week for PS3, Vita, and PSP. Seems like a nice opportunity for fans of From Software's more recent work to see just how far the studio has come over the years.

PlayStation Blogcast 158: Bloodcast [PlayStation Blog]

1001 Spikes Wii U off-TV patch finally coming

Laura Dale, Contributor - Destructoid
5:00 AM on 03.27.2015
1001 Spikes Wii U off-TV patch finally coming photo

Are you a Wii U owner who picked up 1001 Spikes and has been disappointed with the inability to play the game entirely on the GamePad screen? Had you almost given up hope that the promised patch to bring that functionality would ever come? Well rejoice, as it appears that the 1001 Spikes off-TV patch is finally being submitted to Nintendo.

It may not be on your systems for a little while yet, but it's reassuring to know that the functionality is still being worked on and should eventually be in the game. There's also apparently a 3DS patch in the works, but much less is currently known about it.