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Papa Niero
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  Watch Video We're doing the contest thing again, and this time you get to win a Switch right after E3! Your odds of winning are visible this time: your number of entries out of the total entries submitted below. How to win: Tell a friend...   read

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  Watch Video Last week, Kotaku East ran a hyper-sensory commercial that I haven't been able to get out of my head. It's for a bird removal company. There's a very brief Street Fighter sequence, and then it only gets more intense from ther...   read

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Destructoid is looking for a few extra hands to help us with the smaller indie stories we might have missed during the crazy weekday news rush, and with the onslaught that is E3 next month. To apply simply send me a link to s...   read

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  Watch Video In our detailed review, Chris said that Dishonored 2 is all about experimentation. Is this guy doing it right?   Vin Diesel's wacky smithing action was shot by Troy Hicks and has been making the rounds this week on Imgur. Serves him right. If you're going to be accused of murder it's best to kill everyone to prove your innocence. Serenity now!     read

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[The original article said a woman would have sex for $25 worth of McNuggets, but she was willing to hit for $25 AND McNuggets, which is less surreal but still hilarious. The article was also updated to shield me from libel j...   read
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  Watch Video Joke article? No way, I'm totally serious. This afternoon I spent like four or five minutes researching Wikipedia and like two other links and found the very best that North Korean game engineering has to offer. Granted, ther...   read
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  Watch Video The review scores of Mario Sports Superstars drove the Mushroom Kingdom to drinking, and the drink of choice is a new brew of DEKAVITA C, which roughly translates to "Big Vitamin C".  It's Suntory Corporation's watery, l...   read
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  Watch Video Having trouble tracking down a Nintendo Mini, or can't wait for the inevitable Super Nintendo Mini? How about building your own PlayStation Mini? It's tempting for the bragging rights alone, and some are on sale from $19 plus...   read
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Don't talk to Bronson Pinchot. Don't cross the street without consulting two gays. Don't Instagram wild animals. Don't work at a video game blog. And never miss your rent payment because you bought a $1200 video card. Especia...   read
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  Watch Video This week, Destructoid's staff began voting on our 30 favorite Super Nintendo games in anticipation for the much-rumored SNES comeback. It's getting ugly and personal. One guy voted fourteen times for Ken Griffey Jr. We'll ha...   read

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  Watch Video Is Destructoid really eleven years old? Yee*.  *I apologize if that came off as anti-Cretaceous. I'd like to thank my momma, Jordan, Chris, Brett, Steven, Zack, Stephen, Holmes, Darren, Jed, Alissa, Caitlin, Josh, ...   read

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Some exciting hardware news out of GDC: Nvidia's shipping a faster graphics card on March 6th, and perhaps more exciting - they're dropping the price on the much-hyped GeForce 1080 GTX for $499. The new GeForce 1080 Ti is due...   read

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  Watch Video Have you seen the Helm Systems logo? When I got the business card I was like GIGGLE GIGGLE CONDOMS while totally keeping my composure. This is the second time I've had a chance to check their upcoming title, and yet again I c...   read

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  Watch Video There's a soft spot in my heart for SHMUPS, right next to the hardened part where I want all birds to be deep-fried in canola. Though still very much a work in progress, I enjoyed a few ridiculous rounds of Flappin Nutz...   read
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  Watch Video I went on a video game cruise for a week. What an asshole, right? You can't say I didn't invite you! I did an interview with the founders a while back. It's annual and open to the public.  Joining GaC...   read
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The first-ever GaCuCon Gaming Cruise land expo went down last night and it was legit, comfortable, and indie-tastic. We were treated to play new games in progress, like a shmup where an old man takes vengeance on birds for sh...   read
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  Watch Video Update: GaCuCon kicks off tomorrow night from 5-10 at Dave n Busters Dolphin Mall in Miami! Here's the info There's a gaming cruise? Of course there is, don't you think there should be? After all, there's EDM cruises, clothi...   read
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  Watch Video Montaro is not a very good game, but had it been released in 1988 it would have been game of the year. Now, before you say this would be true of every disgusting game you own, Montaro is so simplistic that it could have been ...   read
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Update: Square replied to a customer on 12/9, and according to the email (copied below) the fix is coming in a month. A month! Doesn't that just give you that warm and fuzzy pre-order feeling?  Thank you for contacting ...   read
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Harry Potter, eat your heart out. Google made a cat wizard game and it's so cute you're going to want to punch your eyes in. It might be easy to miss: Google has rolled out a new homepage that looks like a Halloween cart...   read

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  Watch Video We interrupt your news feed to give you a very pretty game for free -- the devs of Pankapu have showered us with 100 Steam codes and one of them could be yours! Simply drop a comment below and you'll be selected at random to...   read

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  Watch Video Remember that sick Bullet Train demo? It looks like we're not getting it, or it's been infused into what ultimately became Robo Recall, a lighthearted VR shooter revealed today at Oculus Connect. The plot seems familiar...   read
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  Watch Video Haydee, if you haven't heard, is the ass-to-face indie puzzler that's been turning heads all week for its glorious robottocks(tm) and otherwise awful, unintuitive, punishing gameplay that roguelike-lovers crave. Former Destr...   read
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  Watch Video Ok, point your monitor away from adults who tuck their shirts in by their own free will. This one's a little NSFW. In Safety First!, you gotta know when to piss and when to hold it. You piss to win. You beat the game if you ...   read
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  Watch Video Obviously, Nvidia's Quadro M6000 is not designed for gaming. The GPU is on par with Nvidia's top-of-the-line GeForce cards, but there's that ridiculous 12 to 24 Gigs of optional ECC memory in the pants. Putting logic aside an...   read

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Yesterday, some Nexus phone owners were treated to an upgrade to Nougat aka Android 7.0, the latest version of Google's we-can-do-iOS-stuff-too-kinda operating system. It's by far the best version of Android I've ever used; p...   read
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For the uninitiated, Destructoid has a sort of in-house quasi-Twitter feed for our community members called Qtoid or "Quickposts on Destructoid". It's sort of where people post quick status messages, and that can be upvoted a...   read

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  Watch Video He had me at "breastfeeding is just a zip away." I was going through my YouTube feeds and spotted a smorgasbord of Fallout 4 mods worth looking into, as spotted by MxR Mods, including a fully functional portal gun. One of the...   read

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It's been a little while since we've had some cosplay on the home page, and we usually run that sort of thing on the weekend.  In an inexperienced attempted to fix this my journey went horribly awry. Somewhere down the r...   read
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Mario Blanket
I'm not sure what's more impressive: the blanket, the fact that he put 800 hours of painstaking detail into it, or that this took six and a half years of on-and-off production before it was complete. It measures 2.2 x 1.8 fun...   read
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About Papa Nieroone of us since 9:58 PM on 03.16.2006

Sometimes I google "photos of horses vomiting" just to release some stress.

Early career:

You may know me as the guy that chased Jack Thompson around courtrooms, the guy that snuck into E3 in a robot helmet, or the publisher of one of your favorite games critics. At the end of the day my job is to keep Destructoid interesting, carrying us through the ever-changing games media landscape. In my spare time I'm also your webmaster, updating the site so Google doesn't murder us. Also I'm a playable character in Retro City Rampage:


(along with the whole 2009 Dtoid Editorial team)


I mustache you where the cake is

About me: Typical gamer. Mostly PC, mobile, and retro. Favorite game of all time is probably Mega Man 2, though I have to pull myself away from JRPGs or our site loses a founder for three months. When I'm not yelling at people online I enjoy people watching and buying games for my dad, who despite being in his late 60's writes his own strategy guides and prints GameFAQs, which makes me incredibly proud.

My dog checks all my work for bugs:
I don't have kids but I have a cool nephew (and my Destructoid kids are enough, I'm like Papa Niero with so many of us breaking into biz), so I travel easily and inexpensively when I can. Sometimes I teach English to ESL students. I can speak and read a little Japanese and Spanish. I went to school for illustration. I'll post some old drawings here when I can find them. Of course, I drew the Destructoid logo based on the Japanese Smoking Robot toy.


Destructoid is not financially successful, but it grants all of us an incredible amount of flexibility. Living well doesn't require all that much money anyway. I've had roommates throughout my 30's in San Francisco (like Full House) and it was the best adventure ever, though quite scary and uncertain at times as I moved on a whim. It all worked out.


My dream is to retire (and beat all my Steam games) and continue doing exactly what I do every day but in Tokyo, where I've lived off and on for the last two years after realizing it was much cheaper than San Francisco (seriously, look into it) I've also traveled through Habitat for Humanity, doing free construction work in Central America. Awesome times.


My advice to people who want to work in videogames is to just start doing the work, even if you do it incredibly poorly at first, until it just happens. You want to be a writer? Write daily and try different strategies daily. I've crashed this website so many times I've lost track but I keep at it. That's been my story: fake it till you make it. I was definitely not invited to E3 but I just wouldn't give up, and now I've been to almost every videogame event all around the world. It took a lot of lost sleep to get to where I am. Years. But, if I can do it, then anybody with grit can do it. You have to be Stan Bush and dare, or at least Weird Al and dare to be stupid. Either way you'll make traction.

Live your dream! You only have one ticket, you may as well go for it. Fuck sleeping. Ship something daily. Build. Never. Stop.

This is me backing up your blogs:


Email me at [email protected]
Xbox LIVE:Destructoid
PSN ID:Destructoid
Steam ID:DtoidNiero
BattleNET:DtoidNiero


 

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