Bob Dylan sings songs about his huge tits
[We post a lot of articles here at Destructoid. The endless, ouroboros news cycle has us burning the snake at both ends, which will ultimately push big news, thoughtful original pieces, and all sorts of other great content off of the front page. Check here every Saturday for my attempt to rectify that.]
This week was all about Metal Gear. It still doesn't feel exactly like a new Metal Gear is coming out, maybe because Ground Zeroes is only a prologue. But, anyway, Max infiltrated Kojima Productions and wrote a million words about Metal Gear over several articles. Literally a million words. Go see. I'm not a liar.
By the way, I'm definitely taking you to Disneyland this year and I will definitely make it to your last softball championship even though I missed all those other games.
Here's last week's post. Let's begin anew.
In all seriousness, I've been a fan of Metal Gear Solid for over half my lifetime, which is a rather staggering realization. With that much anticipation and excitement built up, I could've very easily come away from this tour completely crestfallen, saying "eh, it's just a regular office" and sounding like a totally jaded douchebag. Thankfully, I got to see a creepy rubber head, learn how to make centipede noises with a broom, and stand in a conference room that looked just like CGI.
PC Port Report: Thief - Alasdair Duncan
Chris Carter found Thief a bit middling, but he didn't play it on PC, where the series has made its bed since its inception. How does the PC version hold up to scrutiny? Well, Alasdair Duncan is actually enjoying it more. I think that's more a difference of opinion than PC superiority, though.
Whilst it doesn't hit the high points of the previous Thief titles, this 2014 release is still worth playing on PC. Give the controller option a try if you're not feeling that the keyboard and mouse controls are your thing; both have their places as far as I'm concerned. Oh, and take on some of the side missions as soon as you can; to me, that's where the heart of the game really lies.
Fear, Disney, positivity, Zynga and more with Erin Reynolds - Jonathan Holmes
Last Sunday on Sup Holmes (now on iTunes) we welcomed Erin Reynolds of Flying Mollusk to the program. We talked about so many things, like the influence Ecco the Dolphin and Gremlins had on her formative years, why she got into game development, that jerk from Fox News (my words, not hers), her work at Disney and Zynga, her thoughtful-but-dead baby drawings, the Michelle Obama awarded student game Trainer, depicting mental illness in games, the idea of "positive games," and of course, Nevermind -- the biofeedback-integrated horror game she's been working on for the past few years.
Farts 'N' Crafts: Batman's Giant Robot - Max Scoville
Hey everybody! Here's the second episode of Farts 'N' Crafts, the show where I draw pictures of stuff related to what's going on in gaming. Today, there's a lot of buzz about a new Batman game from Rocksteady, and Titanfall continues to be great, as demonstrated by this adorable trailer and these leaked maps and screenshots, which reveal that there are alien dinosaurs in the game. Aren't video games grand?
Dumb Idiot Ideas: Metal Gear Solid ski gloves and panties - Max Scoville
Hey, did you see those Metal Gear Solid V: Ground Zeroes track jackets and sneakers that Puma's making? They're pretty cool, but a franchise with such awesome character and mechanical designs really deserves more creative merchandising. Here are a few ideas.
Hardline 011: The crying symbol of Europe - Steven Hansen, Jordan Devore, Hamza Aziz
What a news week! On this episode of Hardline, Hamza Aziz and Steven Hansen joined me in getting all excited for Rocksteady's Batman: Arkham Knight, wondering what caused Uncharted creative director and writer Amy Hennig to leave Naughty Dog, and recapping Konami's recent press showing of Metal Gear Solid: Ground Zeroes. There are no boxes!
Video impressions of Metal Gear Solid V: Ground Zeroes - Max Scoville
Max has put up loads of words about Metal Gear Solid. If you don't want to read because reading is for squares, watch this video.
War Has Changed: What's NOT in MGS V: Ground Zeroes - Max Scoville
No cardboard box. (!)
Dying to hear all the dirt but don't want to take the time to read my full preview of Metal Gear Solid V: Ground Zeroes? Well, if you're not a fan of verbose explanations, I can't imagine you're much of a Metal Gear Solid fan. In any case, here's a quick rundown of some classic Metal Gear elements that you won't be finding in the latest release.
The layout of Camp Omega feels reminiscent of the first few areas of MGS1, and the new mechanics like driving and climbing are as novel as arranging the bodies of unconscious guards in lewd positions, or hiding in lockers in MGS2. While I feel like I’ve experienced a lot of what the game has to offer, that doesn’t stop me from wanting to play more of it, and if the goal here was to whet my appetite for The Phantom Pain, I’d say mission accomplished.
Still, it really sucks about that cardboard box.
First details on Azure Striker: Gunvolt - Dale North
We were among the first to get our hands on Keiji Inafune's / Inti Creates' new 3DS side-scrolling action game, Azure Striker: Gunvolt here at BitSummit 2014 in Kyoto, Japan.
We now have the first details on the game's story, world, and characters, straight from the developers.
Listen up, Mega Man fans: Keiji Inafune is the Executive Producer, and Yoshihisa Tsuda (Mega Man X2, Mega Man 7, 9, 10, and more) is the Game Director. Yoshitaka Hatakeyama (Mega Man 9) is on art, while Takuya Aizu (several Mega Man games, as well as Mighty No. 9) acts as Producer. Finally, Ippo Yamada is over music and sound effects.
Naturally, we ran over to see it immediately.
Nova-111 has captured my heart in real-time - Brett Makedonski
Nova-111 frequently throws different enemy types and environmental traps into the mix, always keeping the player on their toes, forcing them to play both quick and smart. If this weren’t enough to facilitate action, the player’s ship constantly uses fuel, meaning that there can’t be any dilly-dallying about.
The Modern Zombie Taxi Driver uses Oculus Rift to chauffeur the undead - Brett Makedonski
The premise is simple. Pick up zombies and take them where they want to be dropped off. Get extra cash for showing some hustle and destroying things along the way. We know that formula quite well. It’s the first-person viewpoint that makes The Modern Zombie Taxi Driver so fun.
HOTTEST, SLIMIEST NEWS OF THE WEEK
Sweet Christmas do we have some great news about video games today!
Let’s see… My previews for Metal Gear Solid V: Ground Zeroeswent up, a new Batman game was announced by Rocksteady, Batman: Arkham Knight, Watch Dogs finally has a release date, and there’s a new Dragon Age: Inquisition trailer. On a less fun note, Mad Catz announced a partnership with Ouya, and on a downright depressing note, Disney Interactive has laid off 700 employees.
Batman: Arkham Knight announcement trailer - Alessandro Fillari
Details leaked for reported fourth and final Arkham game, Batman: Arkham Knight - Chris Carter
'Arkham Knight' is actually the name of a new Batman villain - Chris Carter
New details have emerged from the Game Informer cover story of Batman: Arkham Knight, and there's a lot to take in. First off, "Arkham Knight" is actually the name of a new villain that was created by DC Entertainment. The character will apparently "really challenge Batman to go head to head with him in lots of different ways." The old voice cast is also back, including Kevin Conroy as Batman.
Twitch Plays Pokemon is now playing Pokemon Crystal - Chris Carter
In case you were living under a rock for the past few weeks, a group of individuals teamed up to beat Pokemon Red by way of thousands of simultaneous chat inputs. The experiment was called Twitch Plays Pokemon. It took over 400 hours to do it, but they actually succeeded in beating the game, promising a "new adventure" today. That adventure is Pokemon Crystal, the third iteration of Generation II, following Gold and Silver.
Fan art poster of over 200 Final Fantasy characters is AMAZING - Steven Hansen
Go see this big art.