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Wanking Simulator achieves release this fall

I'd normally save this sort of thing for my weekly weird games roundup, but I was too excited to restrain myself. I was practically turgid with anticipation, and the only way to sate my raging emotion was to whip it out and spread the news ...

 
 
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Contest: Win a Switch copy of Safety First!

The name of the game is safety in today's contest for a Switch copy of Safety First! I don't think I've ever been this happy in my entire life. Seriously. Well, maybe once. But this is definitely the second happiest I've ever been. And it's...

 
 
 
 
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Keep your dingus warm in SCUM's Winter update

Tis the season for murdering each other on a prison island, so SCUM is getting into the festivities with a new update. To get your winter wonderland on, players will be able to explore a snow covered map, get into snowball fights and sled d...

 
 
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Contest: Win Breathedge for Steam

Ready for some more free games? Today Breathedge is up for grabs -- don't miss out on this contest! I don't know of many games where an immortal chicken is used as a tool to break things, plug leaky pipes, and scan electronic equipment. In ...

 
 
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Review: Genital Jousting

Gaming is such a strange and wonderful hobby. You can play in recreations of history’s greatest moments, explore alien planets, race in futuristic space craft and now play as a big floppy penis that is trying to insert itself in the a...

 
 
 
 from  japanator
 
 
 
 from  our Community Blogs
 
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From our community  

How to Self-Destructoid

[With emotions riding high in the community, Deadmoon shares with us why exactly it is he loves this crazy, broken Dtoid family. <3 ~ JuIc3] A lot of my friends make fun of me when I tell them that I'm an active part of an online communi...

 
 
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My introduction to the Destructoid tip line

So, one of the main benefits of joining the writing staff here is that I've been included on the tip line. Basically, anyone in the world can send an e-mail to [email protected], and the writing staff can sort through those submissions a...

 
 
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YouPorn eSports team banned by league

YouPorn, which my colleagues tell me is a supplier of online "adult" entertainment, sponsors an eSports team, Team YP. It has since 2014, back when I wrote, "More like spornsporning an eSporn team." Hah, nice. Unfortunately, this relationsh...

 
 
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Hot Mess: 10 Years of Destructoid party photos

There's something about the Mr. Destructoid helmet that brings out the animal in people. I've seen sheepish tiny McChicken-like boys turn into fearless crotch-thrusters, running up on stages and doing what three shots of Jager could not aff...

 
 
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Friday Night Fights - Happer Nooo Yur!

Dear lord it's bright. Worked till 6am, drank till 8 and back up at 12pm. Choices. Ugh. It's almost 1pm and I need to go back to work. At least it's Friday and it's a short, 4hr shift. It's the little things. Now excuse me, there's ham on m...

 
 
GOTY 2015 photo

Destructoid's award for Overall Best Game of 2015 goes to...

The downfall of Japanese game development has been greatly exaggerated. It sort of reminds me of what happened a century ago, when Dr. Kellogg introduced Kellogg's Corn Flakes in hopes that it would reduce masturbation. Kellogg devoted much...

 
 
 
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Friday Night Fights - Ch-ch-ch-chaaaanges

Well isn't this Hunky Dory? A nice little Friday. We have a new Call of Duty to play together. We have a new Fallout to play with ourselves (HA! HA!). We have herpes. Wait, that's just me. My bad. "So shut up and tell us what's changing Mik...

 
 
 




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Everybody's Golf VR"It's all in the hips"

 

A Plague Tale - Innocence"Bless the Beasts and Children"

 

Review in Progress: Total War: Three Kingdoms"You may want to pursue Lu Bu"

 

Team Sonic Racing"All-star?"

 

Blood: Fresh Supply"I live again"

 

Rage 2"Against the Machine 2"

 

Astro A40 TR Headset + MixAmp Pro TR"For the professional gamers out there"

 

Oculus Rift S"New and improved"

 
 
 

Community Blogs | expand

 

Quickposts expand | +quickpost

Electric Reaper

Pretty much every page in My Girlfriend is a T-Rex functions as a self-contained joke or Individual pages could be printed in the daily paper, and the jokes would work just

 
Mike Sounders

Beat the Gundam Breaker 3 DLC Still have Sekiro and KH to play, and Im rewatching GaoGaiGar with Gus and Vxxy, but my hearts wanting to rewatch Turn A

 
Jetter Mars

Just beat Kid Dracula off the My thoughts are in the

 
Parismio

Speaking of final fantasy I got the switch version for my bday yesterday and ive been having fun on handheld while watching I also nabbed ff11 collection on sale and pre-ordered ff14 shadowbringers for that leveling

 
Tyge

Dont usually like rep my own stuff, but my class is livestreaming out of the Legoland sealife aquarium right Check it

 
Electric Reaper

I get so annoyed with heroes blaming themselves for the misery and deaths caused by evil Yes, you might have had a chance to execute the However, Crazypants is to blame for any murders Crazypants

 
taterchimp

I was satisfied with the end of Game of

 
Osc

So I got this a few minutes

 
PhilKenSebben

This is my

 
triggerpigking

todays daily-sketch, been a while since I drew to experiment with different brushes and didnt get the watercolor look I wanted but I still dig

 
 

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