Mass Effect novels coming soon; please press B to turn page

Mass Effect, Bioware’s latest mega-RPG, is set to blow the pants off of every Xbox 360 unfortunate enough to have been stuffed into a pair of pants. Of course, gamers will have to wait until this summer to experience the pants-shattering epic, but for those with the patience of a gnat on Adderall, a sneak peak into the Mass Effect universe will be available in the form of two prequel novels, the first of which will be released in May.

Traditionally, novelizations based on video games have been horrible at best, and, at worst, they’ve caused AIDS in otherwise healthy children. In one case, a novel based on DOOM burned and defiled most of a village in Africa and proclaimed itself the de facto leader of the region (only to be toppled a few weeks later by an SAS incursion, sponsored by local drug lords). 

Earnest Cavalli
I'm Nex. I used to work here but my love of cash led me to take a gig with Wired. I still keep an eye on the 'toid, but to see what I'm really up to, you should either hit up my Vox or go have a look at the Wired media empire.