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#Poop Emergency


Giveaway photo
Giveaway
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Giveaway - The Count Lucanor (Steam)

Steam sale? Naw, let's give something away. On deck today is a lovely little gem called: The Count Lucanor. What's it about? Let's go to the blurb from the official site:   read

 
 
Ark poop, explained photo
Ark poop, explained

Ark: Survival Evolved's poop button was a suicide alternative

Dino-themed survival sandbox Ark: Survival Evolved is a bit poop-obsessed, reaching Metal Gear Solid V: The Phantom Pain "Do it (Defecate)" heights of in-game feces. And while Ark's poop button is funny and even has resource use in the craf...   read

 
 
Farts 'N' Crafts photo
Farts 'N' Crafts
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Farts N Crafts: Duke Nukem's Turdy Dogfight

Following up Friday's debut of "Dumb Idiot Ideas," here's the first episode of another weekly series: "Farts 'N' Crafts." On this show, I draw horrible pictures of things vaguely related to what's going on in the world of video games. Today...   read

 
 
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Harvest Moon is better than cow poopoo all over your face

Did you know cows can have explosive diarrhea? I didn't know that until I saw this ad for Harvest Moon: A New Beginning. Thanks for enlightening us with this informational video, Marvelous AQL! [Thanks, Dave!]   read

 
 



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E3 scandal exposed: ESA makes journos poop in the dark

Hey ESA, can we get some light bulbs in the press bathrooms? The international boys can't aim.   read

 
 
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Dump on this: Monster Hunter toilet paper holders

It's official: the Japanese can't even take a sh*t without thinking about Monster Hunter. This October, for a mere 1000 yen (about $13), they'll be able to purchase a toilet paper holder based on either cat species from the Monster Hunter s...   read

 
 
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Icarus Proudbottom, a crappy little indie game

I have found that, when it comes to indie games, it's best to try and have no expectations whatsoever. Impossible, really, when you see a field full of platformers and space shooters but it's something I that I keep in mind. Icarus Proudbot...   read

 
 
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Ubisoft explains Avatar's failure through contradiction

In case you hadn't heard, or hadn't assumed, James Cameron's Avatar: The Game sucks and its sales suck too. Much like any good game developer who has a flop game that was supposed to be a major seller, Ubisoft has begun to march in the excu...   read

 
 
nasty". According to the ESRB, The Crystal Bearers will include "damn", "hell", "bikinis that expose deep cleavage", "telekinetic powers to throw people off cliffs", "a goblin samurai holding a sake-shaped bottle (who) appears to be drunk", "steaming manure", "You were peeping?!" and "How icky of you to watch girls changing!"

Any game that takes the premise of Hancock, puts it in the Final Fantasy Crystal Chronicles universe, then releases itself on f*cking Kwanzaa has my utmost respect. Add skeletons on motorcycles, break-dance fighting, and now psychic turd flinging, and you have something unlike any other game out there. Even if The Crystal Bearers completely sucks, I'll still want it for the novelty alone.

Still not convinced? Then hit the jump to see a group of levitating moogles get their collective-crotch grabbed. 

Kwanzaa can't come soon enough...

[via Siliconera

[embed]151592:23490" data-vidtitle="

Steaming turd tossing in the Crystal Bearers ESRB-nounced Everything may seem serene in the above video, but Final Fantasy Crystal Chronicles: The Crystal Bearers promises to be quite "nasty". According to the ESRB, The Crystal Bearers will include "damn", "...  
Full story

" data-purl="steaming-turd-tossing-in-the-crystal-bearers-esrb-nounced-151592.phtml" data-vidsummary="" data-remodal-target="watch"> photo
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nasty". According to the ESRB, The Crystal Bearers will include "damn", "hell", "bikinis that expose deep cleavage", "telekinetic powers to throw people off cliffs", "a goblin samurai holding a sake-shaped bottle (who) appears to be drunk", "steaming manure", "You were peeping?!" and "How icky of you to watch girls changing!"

Any game that takes the premise of Hancock, puts it in the Final Fantasy Crystal Chronicles universe, then releases itself on f*cking Kwanzaa has my utmost respect. Add skeletons on motorcycles, break-dance fighting, and now psychic turd flinging, and you have something unlike any other game out there. Even if The Crystal Bearers completely sucks, I'll still want it for the novelty alone.

Still not convinced? Then hit the jump to see a group of levitating moogles get their collective-crotch grabbed. 

Kwanzaa can't come soon enough...

[via Siliconera

[embed]151592:23490" data-vidtitle="

Steaming turd tossing in the Crystal Bearers ESRB-nounced Everything may seem serene in the above video, but Final Fantasy Crystal Chronicles: The Crystal Bearers promises to be quite "nasty". According to the ESRB, The Crystal Bearers will include "damn", "...  
Full story

" data-purl="steaming-turd-tossing-in-the-crystal-bearers-esrb-nounced-151592.phtml" data-vidsummary="" data-remodal-target="watch">  Watch Video

Steaming turd tossing in the Crystal Bearers ESRB-nounced

Everything may seem serene in the above video, but Final Fantasy Crystal Chronicles: The Crystal Bearers promises to be quite "nasty". According to the ESRB, The Crystal Bearers will include "damn", "hell", &qu...   read

 
 



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Suda 51 un-clearly clarifies No More Heroes' future

Want to see No More Heroes on the 360 or the PS3 someday? I wouldn't blame you if you had your hopes up. Suda 51 (the game's creator) has said many times that he'd like to bring the series to one or more of the HD consoles. Or did he?In the...   read

 
 
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Get your ass to PAX! No More Heroes 2 playable at PAX 2009

I'm so frickin' jealous of all of you that will be at PAX 2009 this weekend. Unfortunately, one of my stupid friends decided to get stupid-married and I'll be at his stupid-wedding in NYC next Saturday, when instead I should be living out m...   read

 
 
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Art imitates life: Suda51 devised Travis Touchdown while, ahem, pooping

Recently, Official Nintendo Magazine got a chance to sit down with Grasshopper, the team responsible for critical darling No More Heroes. While the interview provides a neat and tidy synopsis of No More Heroes' development cycle, it provide...   read

 
 
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HUGE Sony victory: Vampire Rain CONFIRMED for PlayStation 3

That's it boys, the console war is finally over. You can roll out the red carpet and welcome your new king, as publisher AQ interactive confirms that Vampire Rain, up until now a hot Xbox 360 exclusive, is coming to the PlayStation 3. For t...   read

 
 
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Good idea, Bad idea: Dynasty Warriors and the hack n' slash pretenders

As an early adopter of Destructoid's new Monthly Musings program (before we find out that half the articles have Red Ring of Death problems), I have pledged to the good Reverend Anthony that I shall fully support the scheme with an article ...   read

 
 



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McDonald's blames fat kids on videogames

If you felt that today was lacking a few ironic laughs, you'll be pleased to know that Steve Easterbrook, the chief executive for McDonald's UK, has recently blamed videogames and TV for child obesity. While he quasi-admitted that it might ...   read

 
 
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Bored at work? Check out the top ten most addicting flash games

As I worked in an office for two years, I'm more than aware of the brain-numbing boredom that comes with a desk and a cubicle. Late afternoon usually brings on idle thoughts of leaping out the window or the desperation of reading LiveJourna...   read

 
 
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If I must be lonely, I'd rather be alone: Guitar Hero III gets co-op patch

1up has word that Guitar Hero III will be seeing a patch addressing the complaints many people have had with the game's lack of offline co-op. The patch -- of which only a 360 version has been so far revealed (though a Wii and PS3 version a...   read

 
 
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Podtoid 22: The John Sweeney Angry! Edition

I'm sure some of you have already heard of the Beeb's John Sweeney going absolutely s**t-bonkers in the middle of a Scientology exhibit on psychiatry, and how it's, y'know, an industry (of death). Photos of dead babies and ...   read

 
 
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Halo 3 Beta contest winner!

Look I drink...And HarassmentPanda won his way into my heart because he does too. Thanks to everyone that entered. There will be a 2nd and 3rd place prize as well. You get codes too. I told you, I am a simple man. Hit full story to see...   read

 
 



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Condemned 2: Bloodshot announced

Not to be outdone by legions of angry, bloodthirsty critters, Sega also announced Condemned 2: Bloodshot as its follow-up to Criminal Origins, the junkie-slaying Xbox 360 launch title that had early adopters crying themselves to sleep. The ...   read

 
 
Aaron LindeFeatured blogger
 


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Community expand | +quickpost

Parismio

Steven Universe today bringin in the Darn this show going from heartwarming to really sad in a splitsecond!

 
AvtrSpirit

Rude people are out in numbers today in Overwatch What is it about a Wednesday that brings such lovely language out of people?

 
Jed Whitaker

What is everyones Pokemon GO progress? Im level 17, with 74 caught, and 74 seen (though I dont think it counts egg hatched as I also have one gym that is only accessible via boat, so hopefully I can hold it

 
ShadeOfLight

Random observation: Clinton has announced that some Kaine person will be her Running Shame, Id rather have

 
Mike Martin

Join Communicord, a sister server to the main Dtoid Run by the community, for the community:

 
homeoftheblues

Looky at what my wife Not to bad for being hopped up on pain pills after knee

 
CyborgAlien

Its not changing for my

 
CyborgAlien

This song brings me back to my gamer Haha RADICAL! XD

 
Inquisitive Ravenclaw

I was looking for gameplay of Gotta Protectors since its coming out tomorrow, and look who just happened to be playing it a year ago!

 
Madoka Malika
 

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