Aaaaand welcome back to Destructoid, the only web site that gives you free Playstation 3's by the virtue of sacrificial virgin slaughtering to appease the Gods! Kratos, can you please stop having an orgy and show our readers what's behind door number one? Um, where the hell is that guy? Whatever ... here's the grand prize:
A brand-spanking new PlayStation 3 premium bundle with HDMI output, 80GB of storage space, the ability to display Talladega Nights in full HD, and Motorstorm!
While the Gods are gracious, we're even more thankful to our new sponsor God of War: Betrayal for making this giveaway a possibility. It's quite possibly the most hardcore cell phone game ever made (sorry Carmack) and available right now. Here's how you can get it on AT&T/Cingular, Verizon, and Sprint. You can also see a trailer for it by texting KRATOS to 4SONY. If you pick it up let us know what you think in the comments below!
Just goes to show -- I have a feeling we're going to see a lot more quality games about to hit mobile soon with the silent battle between the DS and the iPhone brewing, but that's another topic altogether. Bet you want to know how to pry this PSTriple from my cold dead robot arms, right?
HOW TO WIN
No purchase necessary! This is a random drawing by ballots. The contest ends in 30 days and there are 60 possible ballots you can acquire to increase your odds of winning. Destructoid regulars are at a slight advantage here because the sooner you found out about the contest, the better your odds are of winning. Just a little love there for our loyal readers!
Win 1 Ballot Daily by posting a Betrayal comment here
Create a Destructoid comments account and post a comment on this post with the word Betrayal in it. Your phrase should be unique every day (so we know you're not a bot). Example: "My mom baked a pizza topped with horse testicles and BETRAYAL"
Win 30 Ballots by theming your community blog with Kratos
Create a custom God of War community blog header! We are leaving this one highly up to interpretation. If its a photo of you with your head shaved in a miniskirt tearing a goat's head off, that counts too. Just refrain from posting photos of double orgies, let's keep it SFW! You can make something cool with the high res wallpapers attached to this story, that's cool too. Just upload your masterwork and announce it with a post in your blog. We'll be making daily sweeps looking at these. Watermark your masterpiece with your name so you don't get raped by a slacker.
*60 Ballot Bonus*
This month we are adding the ability to view Community Blog stats and will be displaying who the top ranked bloggers are. Your Destructoid Rank is primarily calculated by most hits on all blog posts x the number of users that have commented on your blog *from different IP addresses* divided by how many attention-whoring posts we flag internally. You pretty much have to not suck and you'll do great. We are awarding 60 additional ballot points to the single top-ranked community blogger, doubling one person's chances of winning.
The contest ends on September 19th, so get cracking!
CONTEST RULES - TEH' FINE PRINT
I was about to copy and paste our standard sweepstakes legal here which nobody will read or care about, so I thought I would paraphrase it and try to keep our web site as free from corporate bullshit as possible:
1) Contest eligible only for US and Canada residents. We'd love to ship to the UK but it costs a bloody fortune, so if you're over there and have a friend in the States and want to stage an eleborate cheat of the rules involving reshipping between you two, we don't want to know!
2) You forfeit all your rights as a human being by entering this contest. Seriously. If you particiate in this contest we have the right to spill boiling coffee on you at McDonalds and laugh at you and you will like it. Seriously though, by entering this contest you're basically agreeing to enter for fun and what Destructoid decides to do with the prize shall not involve you or your sissy-ass lawyer in any way whatsoever or we will sell your unconscious body on eBay (starting a t a penny without a reserve!) to a family of cannibals or gothic otters that cut themselves.
3) Editors, staff, family of staff, ex-girlfriends, secret lovers, ladies in red, klansmen, ninjas, and pirates of Destructoid are not eligible for this contest. Tipsters and news contributors are because, well, we don't pay you shit and we feel bad about it. I swear, one day we'll at least bake you donuts.
4) The selection of the winner will be painstakingly done by hand by printing all the ballots out, cutting them, putting them into an empty can of peanuts, shaking them, and pulling out the winner. We've given away a few PlayStation 3's, DS's, video cards, and so on and we always film the drawing when we do it and post it on YouTube. We might do it live on Stickam this time if it doesn't implode the internet. Either way, you'll see a video of the drawing so you know it was done fair and square. You'll also have a week to dispute any missing ballots before we do the drawing.
5) By participating this contest you agree that Destructoid and Sony Computer Entertainment and it's subsidiaries have no liability whatsoever.
6) Everyone in the Destructoid Community has the right to kick your ass and block/ban your IP and eject you from the contest, so don't be a tool.
7) These rules may change at any time, and we may use the <marquee> tag on the entire post to make it scroll across your screen like text did on web sites in 1998. Hell, we may also choose to exercise the <blink> tag if we'd had a pint.
8) Have fun with it! Please post any questions in the comments and we'll address them asap.