Live in NYC? Feel like poisoning your body and mind? Head on over to McDonalds! Hell, there's one every quarter mile or so, I'm sure you'll be able to walk off your fries. And by "fries," I mean two, maybe three fries. If you want to burn off your entire super-sized junkload you will need to run a damn derby. Good luck on that. But enough bashing on McDonalds; the tired, corroded, barely responsive heart of this story is that now McDonalds is letting you wrap your greasy fingers around Nintendo's beautiful little handheld. The NYC schedule on where to go will magically appear when you press the "View Story" button. Unless, of course, you're on dial-up, in which case it will kinda stumble onto the screen slowly in a way much like the people who eat at McDonalds. Click it anyway, it has info on the other cities in the tour, and I hear you can win free stuff! On Thursday, July 13 you can head on over to the McDonalds on 220 West 42nd Street from noon to 2 PM, and Friday has the same time on 1560 Broadway. Later in the day on Friday, from 4:00 PM to 6:00 PM, there will be another shindig at the McDonalds on 427 10th Ave and 34th Street. Finally, on Wednesday, July 19th, from noon to 2, there will be another McLite (Nintendonalds?) party-thing at the McDonalds on 946 8th Ave and 56th Street. If you don't live in NYC, don't worry, Nintendo's got yo' back, gangsta'. The Nintendo "Street Team" will be going to 9 other cities with the same badass swag. Make sure you ask one of them for a game piece, so you can have a shadow of a sliver of a very small chance of winning a DS Lite. Without further ado, the street team is travelling to: Seattle, Los Angeles, Houston, St. Louis, Chicago, New York, Boston, Philadelphia, San Francisco and Atlanta. The rest of the schedule is at this website. If you have a heart attack because of this contest, I am in no way responsible. God speed and good luck. (For more kickass art like what's seen above, make sure to visit the Dr. McNinja webcomic!