Destructoid’s games of the week for 06/17/07: Father’s Day edition!

Dear Father,

Thank you for raising me, teaching me the difference between wrong and right, and helping to mold me into the respectable young man I am today.

But, um … y’know, if you really loved me, you would have carried me in your womb before expelling me in a cloud of afterbirth, like the chap above.


Professional Oceanographer

None of the below people actually have fathers, so today is just Sunday for us. Hence, we play video games! 

Jim Sterling:
Most of my time has been spent with Crackdown and honestly, if you got rid of that game as soon as the Halo 3 beta ended, then please, drown in glass-filled water as soon as possible. It’s great to play a GTA-style game where you’re not trying to emulate GTA‘s criminal style (which always pales in comparison and just looks childish – Hi Saint’s Row!) and just dispenses some beefy justice.

Aside from that, I was lent a copy of Enchanted Arms which manages to be offensive to gay people but ISN’T funny with it (I partly love the cock myself, but gay stereotypes are usually hilarious). More recently I went and bought Pac Man Championship Edition too, which has reminded me of life’s biggest lesson – ghosts are assholes.

My struggle for free time as of late has been an uphill battle. However, I have found enough time in the early morning to enjoy a few rousing rounds of Command & Conquer 3 for the PC. Granted, I’m still getting my ass handed to me on a regular basis even after the patch, but I am slowly working my way through the ranks.

Look for [Dtoid]Savant in a C&C3 automatch near you!

Ron Workman:
Pac-Man Championship, Prince of Persia, and C&C3. I can’t believe I haven’t got into C&C3 much. I guess it’s the transition to console that is making it tough for me. I really want to get into that game but I just haven’t been drawn in like I wanted to be. on the PC I have been playing How Many Wolves Must Die along with the rest of the staff. We set a world record this week of 71. Congrats everyone.

Dick McVengeance:
I’ve barely been able to touch video games, and so I’m only playing Phoenix Wright: Justice for All … except for the fact that I’m stuck and I have no idea where to go.

Aside from my regularly scheduled titles such as Castlevania: SOTN and Earth Defense Force 2017, I’ve been utterly addicted to SNK vs Capcom: Card Fighters Clash DS. The game itself is almost fatally flawed, and there isn’t much to it, but for someone with the pure, non-sexual affection for Capcom and SNK’s respective game universes as myself, it’s pure bliss. I don’t even want to make it something dirty by adding a quip about impregnating the game, either!

I’m still getting my Lara Croft fix, but had the uncontrollable urge to revisit another favorite series of mine – Legacy of Kain. Needless to say, Defiance is in my PS2 at the moment. Funny thing is, I almost forgot I owned the thing. Luckily, Mrs. Croft and Kain were there to remind me. My deep apologies to Sony.

This week has been pretty hectic and I think I might have spent a collective four hours gaming. I fell to my death a few times in Prince of Persia on XBLA, ran through one event in Forza 2, and played Loco Roco the other day for about 40 minutes. I have no explanation for where that last one came from.


I’ve been playing Legend of Zelda: Twilight Princess and Rayman Raving Rabbids for the Wii and I just finished Mario vs Donkey Kong 2: March of the Minis for the DS. Now I’m trying to finish Touch Detective for the DS, so I can be ready for my new games coming from Konami soon.

I’ve also been playing Dawn of Mana for the PS2 which is not really that great of a game and Oblivion for the Xbox 360 which I’m about half way through. I also tried to play Harvest Moon DS for a bit.

Since I’m through academically priming my brain for the “real world”, I’ve determined to utilize my sharpened cranium to spend countless hours lazily leveling up Steven the Turtwig in Pokemon Pearl (riveting isn’t it!).  I’ve managed to memorize the touchpad actions during battles so I can casually kick Bobby the trainer’s ass while I simultaneously catch up on my psychological thriller movies AND eat nachos with cheesesauce.  Yatta!  Also, while I still have access to a PS3 for another month I’ve been dilly dallying with the miraculous wonders of Flow and nostalgically reminiscing the past with one of my favorite old games Jumping Flash.

I nearly killed myself trying to beat Prince of Persia, but eventually managed to do it. Other than that it’s been mostly Crackdown orb hunting and Gears of War multiplayer.

I only played WarioWare Touched this week and that’s because the power went out. FUN FACT: The DS Lite makes for a perfect flash light.

Chad Concelmo:
Along with playing Rogue Galaxy for yet another week, I found out I was stupid via Big Brain Academy: Wii Degree. Your mom’s stupid, Nintendo. Aw, snap!

Nick Chester:
Lemme see here …

Still playing Spider-Man 3 on the Xbox 360, a game which not only is terrible, but also continually locks up my console. Why am I playing it? Because I hate myself.

This week I was also a ninja and a race driver, with both Tenchu Z and Forza Motorsport 2. Oh, and Fallout on the PC.

Dyson Grigsby:
Hmmm … um, well, other than a Super Smash Bros. Melee, I haven’t really been playing much else. I spent most of the week fucking around with the DS Opera browser, but that’s about it. I did finally get my copy of Crackdown back, so I’ll finally be able to play with the rest of the crew.

David Houghton:
Lots more Mario Strikers again, mostly. Though I have also played a bit of N, and I went through the first seven missions of Earth Defense Force last night too. Admittedly I’ve only played a small bit of it, but does that game get any better? Or any less glitchy? I just seemed to be doing a great deal of not much at all while watching graphics break down.


What have you guys been playing? Stratego? Strip-Backgammon? I MUST KNOW! 

Earnest Cavalli
I'm Nex. I used to work here but my love of cash led me to take a gig with Wired. I still keep an eye on the 'toid, but to see what I'm really up to, you should either hit up my Vox or go have a look at the Wired media empire.