Now I know what youíre thinking, "Oh hey, itís Wednesday morning and Shipero has a blog up. Wait a minute, it isnít about some obscure DOS game. What going on?" Well, lets see if I can explain this, sometimes a blogger and his feature will discover that theyíve grown apart, and that the best thing to do is to take some time away from each other for a while. Now itís not your fault, youíve all been fine, perfectly behaved readers/commenters, these things just happen. Now let me introduce you to my new feature Games that I regret, where I take a look at the games that I regret ever having in my library. Give it a chance, I know itís a big change for you, but I need you to be strong for me. Can you be strong for me, huh, can ya champ?
I love minigame collections, theyíre my guilty pleasure. I love the variety of gameplay, fast paced action, and quirky humor normally found in the genre. For the most part they have been good to me, the WarioWare series is great, and I recently purchased Hot Pixel which is a blast. However not all is well in the land of minigames, some times a game comes along that I not only dislike, but causes me to wonder why I play those types of games at all. One such game is WTF (Work Time Fun) for the PSP.
The premise is that you have been sent to hell, your punishment is to perform menial part-time jobs for the rest of eternity. The jobs range from the mundane (capping pens and chopping wood), to the more eccentric (punching flying vases and feeding giant monsters). Doing these jobs nets you tiny amounts of cash that can be used to purchase new games, and other trinkets from vending machines. Pick your poison.
The vending machines are my main problem with the game. The prizes inside cost between $1 and $50, while you only earn about $1-2 per job. This of course leads to frustration when you want to earn a new job, but instead keep getting panda erasers. It doesnít help that the jobs are long and tedious with little payout. There are jobs that pay better but theyíre mostly based on luck, you could get a lot or you could get nothing. ĒSexing chicksĒ isnít as nearly as hot as it sounds.
An example of one of the higher payout jobs is fishing, after accepting it you wait around for an amount of time between 5 minutes and an hour. After killing time by staring at the sea your boss will come back and you have a minute to react or else be fired for sleeping on the job. The real take the UMD out and throw it in the trash moment comes when after returning, your boss will sometimes inform you that the weather is too bad to continue and youíll be sent home empty handed. The first time this happened to me I had been waiting for fifty minutes, I think itís the closest Iíve ever been to a complete mental breakdown.
This minigame is appropriate because playing it makes you want to play in traffic.
Some of the few interesting features arenít games at all but odd little tools that you can also unlock via the vending machines. These tools turn the PSP into flashlight, mask, personal match maker, or various other devices that a PSP shouldnít be. Most are useless, not a lot of use for a pocket astrologer. However hidden the all the crap is shining gem of pure genius, a tool so useful and awesome it might very well be the pinnacle of human achievement. Words canít accurately describe the sheer brilliance, so just watch the videos below to see the greatest invention ever in action.
Best Ramen Timer Ever:
This one goes out to all the ladies:
Although the sexy girl ramen timer is the most beautiful thing Iíve ever seen, itís simply not enough to make WTF worth your time and money. At the end of the day the game in simply a frustrating, boring, empty husk of a game. If you want to play the game to make amends for past sins, or simply want to use it torture your enemies you can usually find it a specialty game stores for about $25 bucks. Well that does it for the first edition of my new feature, I hope itís up to the usually high standards you come to expect from me. Now if youíll excuse me Iím in the mood for some ramen.