So it's been a while since I've done one of these but it seems my stupidity has only grown since the last time I did this. Which can only be a good thing (or bad, depending on your point of view), since I have all these built up ideas to share with you all! Or maybe I just need to poop? Still haven't figured out the two yet. Well this one is gonna be bit different, I mean it's still going to be a cluster fuck of unfathomable proportions, but instead of the past week or two it's gonna be my favorite things of the past year.
Ready? No, your not ready but I just thought I'd do the polite thing and prepare you for the inevitable. Boot up, Strap in and get you kids to the shelter, because here we go. . .
You know those nightmare situations you dream of? Going to school without pants? No toilet paper after you've "Done" the business? Buying a cat and then remembering your FATALLY ALLERGIC TO THEM on the drive home on the motorway doing one hundred million miles an hour? Or how about the one where you broadcast yourself fapping to the entire internet in between games of League of Legends? Because for poor old (well, young I suppose) Andrew "Slooshi" Pham that happened back in October. Remember Kids, Alt+Tab doesn't work. Use protection.
Slender man. That no good, dirty stinking, alimony dodging scum bag of a farther made the news for scaring kids, and men pretending to be kids, this year with the release of the free-to-play game called "Slender: The Eight Pages". Just think of it as a Garry Glitter simulator and you get the idea.
SEXIST! EVERY-FUCKING-THING IS RACIST. I MEAN SEXIST!
What was probably the biggest surprise announcement this year (and of E3 for sure), was the announcement of a brand new I.P. from Ubisoft called "Watch_Dogs" back in june. An open world game in the same vain as GTA with slo-mo shooting and the ability to control parts of the world around you with your super duper magic phone. GET READY FOR DISAPPOINTMENT FOLKS.
What was probably the biggest surprise announcement this year (and of the VGA's for sure), was
the announcement of. . . Huh, this seems familiar? Basically Dark souls 2 was announced in December and the SQUEALS of joy from Knutaf could be heard all around the world.
Nintendo, here's a word of advice: when a large part of your demographic isn't old enough to watch spongebob yet, teaching them a non-existent word that the 90's would be ashamed of is a VERY bad idea. Know what's an even worse idea Nintendo? Making me fall off my bike. Yea done goofed son. Yea done goofed. ESPECIALLY JUST BEFORE THE CHRISTMAS MONTH!
Well it's been one hell of a year guys and a damn crazy eventful one at that. seeings as it's the 31st and all I might as well get this out of the way: This was the year I took to Destructoid like a fly to takes to a fresh doody. . . basically what I mean is this is the first site I have ever taken an active interest in. Hell at the beginning of the year I was doing one of these blogs a week I was that invested with you guys.
From the Ten-boners-A-Minuet Community manager that is Mr.Andy Dixon to the Poetic Insanity that is Occams Electric Toothbrush, one thing unlike any other site I have ever been to was evident: This is a community to it's foundations. I'd damn well go as far to say a family, with the cooky uncles and the crazy aunts.
From here on out I'm hoping to be even more involved. Blogs more regularly, commenting and FNF. Because as crazy (or creepy I suppose) as this may sound. . . this is my kind of family.
Stay safe dudes, and have a great new year.
LOOK WHO CAME:
Mike Turkey Fker Martin 1