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LONG BLOG

The perfect game to celebrate Orctober

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So, second blog on here. There’s something you should know about me. First, I am a gay dude. Second, I am the exact kind of gay dude who the idea of Orctober appeals to. My biggest regret about getting fired at Blizzard, is that I lost out on getting an employee discount on the no doubt inevitable anatomically correct Thrall robots that will (hopefully) be for sale within the next 10 years.
So of course Bastard Bonds is one of the more appealing games to have been installed on my computer. Because it has shirtless orc dudes, drawn by a guy who is really good at drawing orc dudes in various states of dress and undress. And shirtless orc dudes are always welcome in my lonely life. There are other kinds of dudes, both of the shirt wearing and non shirt wearing calibers, and a few human non dudes. Which help me immerse myself in the fantasy that I am in fact myself in a land of shirtless orc dudes.
In non shirtless orc dude aspects of the game, it has a bit in common with The Stick of Truth- in that it is a rather pared down turn based RPG game (Even more so than South Park) whose charm is layered on. It is simple, and unforgiving. I have died once or twice in the tutorial before I figured out a tactic that worked for me. And although it pains me that the much thinner version of myself is being a tank, rather than being protected by shirtless orc dudes, I’ve found something that works. Though I am still awfully fond of loading up saves. Combat is more dependant on how you place your party, and how you approach enemies. There is a mechanic of recklessness, which varies up the combat just a bit.
The combat is one of the few nitpicky things I can say about the game. It can be a bit tedious and bland once you’ve gotten into a groove that works. And the menu and general UI are a bit cumbersome at times. It’s very clear that the game was done by an artist first and foremost. It’s hard not to feel at times that the UI, puzzles and combat would be more interesting if there were more hands on deck.
But of course, such things are secondary to orc dudes and the absence of their shirts. And as a shirtless orc dude delivery vehicle, it accels. The music is lovely. The story and setting are drip fed through encounters. I’ve spent a good 16 hours playing and still only feel like I’ve hit the tip of the iceberg on things. I’m going to slowly peel away at this game. Getting back into that crpg mindset. Before feasting on Tim Cain’s backlog (hoping he has included some shirtless orc dudes in Tyranny.) And at under 20 bucks on Steam, it’s a pretty damn good way to celebrate the rest of Orctober.
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About The Baked Potatoone of us since 5:52 AM on 07.28.2013

Generic Texan gay gaming nerd in his late 20's, sometimes funny, kind of an asshole. Definitely a recluse.

Spent some time working support for video game companies.
Got a few fancy books and plastic statues in lieu of a living wage.
Spent a little less time trying to write for sites. One isn't around anymore, the other dropped me for a bad review.

And to think all this started with Disney DOS games when I was 4.