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LONG BLOG

Strider's top 10 fetishes I can't believe I'm doing this

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When this topic started making the rounds, I was hesitant to contribute. Look, let's not kid ourselves but Google gave us incognito mode for a reason, you feel me brah? I know my way around an +18 designated area. You don't just watch vanilla anime and think, "You know what? Let's just stop here and not dig any deeper."

I have to admit, while I have a range of fetishes thanks to THE INTERNET and HENTAI influenced by ANIME (the trifecta of all caps), there is still an underlying fantasy of seeing my girlfriend in a few of these things. So if you ever somehow get in contact with her, you never read this list and I'll never destroy you. Still, seeing everyone display their fetishes, however serious they are in revealing their deepest or shallowest secrets, somehow instilled a sense of pride in my taste. Kind of like people describing how they're red blooded Americans who love guns, low brow strip clubs, and mud trucking all unabashedly. So like America's unsung heroes, I shall reveal my favorite fetishes for all to see. So don't talk to other people about it.

Bunny girls
History states that the bunny girl outfit was invented in 1903 by Lee Stanford O'Hare as a method to both scare pests off his farm and to join in the hot craze of misogyny that was sweeping the nation. Back then, they were called Hare Suits, which admittedly didn't roll off the tongue like a bunny outfit. When his farm finally collapsed from the great crow plague of '64, he sold the rights to his hare suit to Hugh Hefner and the rest was history.

Bunny girls are a great symbol towards men for luck, affluence, and confidence, while it's either a symbol of sex or something for women. But who wouldn't love to hit it big at gambling and have a bunny girl on your side cheering for your luck. On the other hand, my girlfriend grew up having rabbits as pets, and over time I've associated her with rabbits. I'm especially a sucker for those rabbits with the loppy ears. They look so sad! And my girlfriend can be the same too. Just so sad! But seriously, animals ears are the barely socially accepted animal fetish. Not quite vanilla but not quite furry. You get to fuck a human and yet it's also a cat or whatever be intimate in an acceptable, pro-diversity kind of way. The classic bunny girl wears a a classy one piece and for some reason, cuff links and collar with a bow tie or some other classy neck piece. But if you've seen what Dead Or Alive 5 has done recently then anything can be a bunny suit as long as you have ears on it but the classic remains.

Yukata
Not quite a formal kimono and not quite a relaxing bath robe but all parts thin bedroom wear. In a sense, a yukata is basically an informal kimono you wear to bed or whenever you just want to relax while still letting the air flow around your most important bits. It's one big kilt for men or one big dress for women. It's a big skirt basically.

All the most dreadful fantasies with yukatas show just how thin a yukata can be. Just imagine feeling your hand up your partner as they wear one. I want to imagine it's like wearing nothing at all. Nothing at all. NOTHING AT ALL.

Just a sheer fabric is all that stands between you and a gloriously good time. All the best fantasy see two people sharing a futon, with a yukata barely covering their bodies as they lazily wrapped it around them because they're hoping for the big special to happen. A person wearing a yukata is like a gift waiting to be unwrapped when the mood is right. Best of all, it's personally not that all that out of the realm of possibility. My girlfriend actually bought her dad a yukata. You see, being a weeaboo isn't all that bad? You're afforded certain secret luxuries!

Qipao
You should all know what a qipao is. It's as prevalent in pop culture as the bunny girl. Can't think of it? Let me say one name: Chun-li.

Chun-li is wearing what is basically a stylized, combat modified qipao. A traditional qipao is a tight, form fitting dress that's normally depicted as having a long slit up on side to allow for movement of one of the legs. Of course, Chun-li's dress is altered to allow a whole range of movement for both her legs because let's face it, she isn't best known for punching her enemies.


She... headbutts them?

Either way, the qipao is often associated with traditional, classy socialites when its normal, and trendy young fashionistas when its a more modern take. It's also more morbidly associated with the fetishization of asian women and turning them into objects but that's more of a tumblr post. We're fucking talking about fetishes so I left my shame at the door obviously, what about you Mother Teresa? But obviously what makes the qipao such a alluring image for men is the tight fit and the hint of a leg. If there's one thing I appreciate, it's what I don't see but can see sometime soon. And maybe they got some strong kicks too.

Warriors
Sexy comes in all kinds of ways. Submissiveness is the classic form that everyone is familiar with. But an empowered woman is just as sexy. Being strong and armored doesn't just have to make someone look burly and stout. Moderate use of plate armor can also leave the figure elegant yet still functional.

It's worth nothing that classic boob armor doesn't make much sense. Real armor isn't about stopping impacts but deflecting it. Boob armor, that is, armor that conforms to the contour of the female breast so that the viewer absolutely knows there's a pair of boobs underneath, is fundamentally flawed as the curves have the chance of drawing an attack inwards as opposed to away. Armor is supposed to be tough but I don't think anyone wants to be a magnet to violence.

A woman can still wear relatively moderate plate armor and come out looking elegant yet still ready to cut you in half. I don't need reassurance that there are boobs underneath your armor, petty game developer. A fair maiden wearing a broad piece of steel will still get my blood boiling, especially if she's good with a weapon.


A weapon!

Yes, an actual weapon. Not that thing you perv. We're straddling a fine line aren't we?

Straddling.

Yoga pants
I've admitted to qipaos, bunny girls, and yukata, but somehow I feel ashamed of yoga pants. Sometimes yoga pants just feels like the lowest common denominator of fetishes. It's everywhere because people who wear it, do so because its comfortable. I think its a divisive idea but hey, we're not here to talk about equal representation. I think it's clear from the onset that I wasn't pretending about anything noble. The female figure is alluring and yoga pants don't leave much to the imagination. And that's fine in this circumstance because hey, thinking with my brain uses up precious calories.

I've found blogs devoted to this fetish. Sometimes you'll find very specific hentai about it. If the qipao teases the leg, yoga pants presents a strange quandry as to just how much I really am seeing in person.

Holy crap, let's not get metaphysical about this. I described the symbolism of bunny girls for christ's sake. Yoga pants to me are just easy mode, ok? Are you an ass man, thighs, or legs? You get everything at once, so it must be fattening and we ain't talking KFC.

Cheerleaders
With a big smile and a flash of their... pep! Cheerleaders are an institution of an innocent sexiness. After all, their outfits are made to allow them to do all sorts of stunts that are honestly dangerous and deserving of respect. But seriously, don't you wonder what they do when they go back to the girls locker room except no we don't we all know what they do: WITCHCRAFT.

It's an incredible and mindboggling standard. When we think of upskirt, we think of hastily drawn glances at rare moments of strong wind or climbing steep stairs after a lady. But cheerleaders don't worry about that. They might as well be wearing swim suits underneath as they tumble through the air as their pleated skirts flip through the wind. As American as applepie, which I believe I've used that idiom once before already and if you live in a different country, who cares right? At least we get a bubbly attitude and a breezy skirt to admire. Plus they're freaking cheerleaders, as in they're athletic and toned. You think teams are throwing the heavier set kind of girl? Not unless the rest of the team is musclebound. Light enough to be thrown but strong enough to help throw human beings.

Jesus H. Christmas I started off thinking cheerleaders were cute and ended with the premonition that cheerleaders can throw you.

Stockings
Now this is universal appeal. Stockings are like icing for your eye candy. A pleasing contrast to one's skin tone followed by the unique touch sensation for your grabby mitts. In Western society, I bet it'd usually associated with the power business woman, especially in a fantasy as she lets her hair down and gets a bit wild. But in Japan it is a transcendent ideal that's spawned its own subfetish: zettai ryouiki, or absolute territory; it's a term spawned by none other than Evangelion.

I kid you not, if you search this safe for work term (I think), you will find graphs and diagrams that are borderline scientific about the ratio between a girl's stockings, skirt, and the amount of bare skin that's visible. There is a grading system that's pretty much what kind of socks is she wearing.


Pictured: science

Real zettai ryouiki are thigh highs and over knee socks, giving you the golden ration of skirt, a glimpse of skin, and long flowing legs encapsulated in stockings. It symbolizes a weeaboo's love of the tsundere, budding innocence, and the young woman. But damn if its just nice to touch when you're intimate.

Netorare
Remember when Dreamweaver-sensei made his own top 10 fetish blog and briefly mentioned netorare but didn't give it a spot in the actual list? Yeah, let's go ahead and shine the spotlight on this little gem.

A summation of what it roughly translates into thanks to Fakku would be thus:

"A direct translation of the word results in the definition "having your lover taken from you" or "to have something taken from you while you sleep". This is often accomplished by having main protagonist's loved one seduced away from them, with or without their knowledge."

Pretty much, a netorare doujin has this basic formula: Look at this cute couple, here's the jealous third-party, third-party is in possession of something the couple needs such as money, the female agrees to give it up good baby in exchange for the needed supplies, then finally in the end the third-party turns out to done the deed so well that the female changes teams because damn she can't resist the D.


Yeah, may favorite kind of D! AMIRIGHT?

Ahegao can be spotted alongside netorare and netorare in general can be placed under this umbrella of adultering or extreme content. Not to be confused with ryona which is straight up beating the crap out of a woman, usually in the context of fighting games with female characters, which in itself is a much lighter consideration compared to guro.

We've left the realm of realism for pure fantasy that can only be found in a Comiket doujin circle. Very rarely is there ever a positive outcome to netorare stories but the struggle and the spark of distress in the reader is what consumers most likely respond to.

Chikan
This is like American apple pie to doujin artists. I've seen this theme so many times, I'm convinced it must happen on a daily basis in real life Japan. My worldview is distorted. Thanks Crimson!

Any mild watcher of anime knows of chikan but maybe hasn't heard the term. It's basically public molestation and pretty much legally defined as sexual assault. It is most commonly portrayed as gropers on a train, especially crowded trains so packed that you can't tell who's touching who.

Every other day there's probably a new release or upload that centers around it. From innocent schoolgirls to women who'd qualify as super human, there's always a plot device that allows for free reign for molestation and grabby fun-time.

I suppose what gets me most is that there's always that expression. It's a face that asks why to the whole of humanity as to why this would happen. Maybe other times its just an expression of the realization of helplessness. It all goes back to that primordial attraction to submissiveness. But lol misogyny and sexual assault, am I right?

I might as well also lump forced and rape into this category if we really want to put the screws to these semantics.

Remember kids, never do anything you've just read on this blog. Just turn on your gaming platform of choice and play CoD while calling your opponents/teammates motherfuckers. Be true to yourself!

Being a cool kid
Being cool dates back to medieval times when man of valor and gentlemanly spirit would congregate in decorated halls to discuss all of their best material without fear of the crown striking down their blasphemous words and thoughts. Since then, being cool was a tradition that was handed down from generation to generation in an effort to preserve the coolness. Or I could have described the Illuminati. These two can be interchangeable in my opinion.

So remember guys, be cool.

Well I'll see you all on Doujin-Moe tonight folks. Lay off the Love Live doujins.

- Show me your moves


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About Marcel Hoangone of us since 1:23 PM on 07.09.2011

Local contributor responsible for duties such as engagement, power bombs, cblog promotions, community engagement, and memes. I like fighting games, you scrub.




Introduction post

10 things about me

Another goddamn 10 things about Strider

~Front Paged
- Downloadables: Every night is Monday Night Combat!
- eSports: Someone you know is hype
- Relaxation: Secretly training
- I calls dibs on Gaige!
- Let's explore space! My top 10 space games
- Giving thanks: Turning over a New Leaf
- Strider's GOTY 2015

~FAP Approved!
- A discussion about Catherine with my girlfriend
- So I applied for an internship at X-Play...
- Being Social: Cal State Long Beach's Gaming Club
- Persona 4: Ultimate and 4 other fighting games you probably don't know
- A new return to 3rd Strike Online part 1: Picking a main
- Top 6 somewhat natural disasters in gaming
- Villains: For me my dear, it was merely a Tuesday
- Let's talk about Phoenix Wright and Nova in UMvC3
- How I gave my girlfriend Tetris DS and loved every minute of it
- Let's talk about Rocket Raccoon and Frank West in UMvC3
- Xenophilia: The Universal Language of Mecha
- Asura's Wrath might get panned and I'm ok with that
- Acquisition: Solid Snake signed your what?
- A Valentine's Day reflection: two great loves
- Skullgirls and the art of combos
- 6 reasons why you should check out Legend of Korra
- Today, I thought about oversexualization
- Hype: Japan Time
- Objection! The story of an impossible gift for that special someone
- Cultural identity and Sleeping Dogs
- Finn and Flame Princess' big Disney Adventure Picspam
- FTL: Recovered diaries from a derelict spaceship
- Retaliation: Your guide to fighting the Collectors
-Handsome Jack, the father, the hero, the asshole
- Before StriderHoang, there was Marcel Hoang
- Adventure Time: Hey Ice King! You're not all that mathmatical
- Ralph wrecked his way into my heart
- The sixth generation wishlist from five time Pokemon Champion, Marcel
- Strider's big, fat, ride through 2012
- Being the best predator you can be
- The Striderhoang series Dtoid Trading Card Roundup
- Strider's top 10 Kirby powers
- I love grapplers
- The gift of gaming: BIONIC ARM!
- Strider's big, bonkers GOTY 2014 list
- Strider's favorite ninjas



~Friday Night Fight Replays!
- 09/02/11
- 09/09/11
- 09/23/11
- 09/30/11
- 02/07/12
- 02/12/12



~The Write Stuff! Get to writing!
- 06/30 - The Beginning!
- 07/06 - Line breaks
- 07/13 - Tone
- 07/20 - Commas
- 08/06 - Balance
- 09/03 - Crossposting
- Write Stuff of September - Pride

~ The Cblog Fapcast!
- XCOM or bust!
- The show must Smurf on!
- ScottyG is on the line
- Hobo extraordinaire, Manchild
- The sorry game
- Girlfriend caps
- #1ReasonHow
- Holiday Revengeance
- My Hairy, Downstairs Fapcast
- bbreaking nnews
- Strider alone
- Oh the Injustice!
- Glowbear and hate
- Strider likes Animal Crossing
- E3 jinxed it
- The Steamin'ing
- Return of Pony Pals
- Quotation fingers community
- High as a robot with Lemon Buster
- I can't believe it's not Pisstoid with Nanashi
- I'm really [heavy sigh] feeling it



Also, check me out on Bitmob!
Xbox LIVE:StriderHoang
Steam ID:StriderHoang


 

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