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LONG BLOG

A Declaration of War on the Bastard Smurfee McGee (NVGR)

   0


Tonight an uneasy truce was broken. Decades of peace have been pissed away and many innocent people have and will continue to suffer, as long as this conflict is allowed to continue. Monday recapper and all around scoundrel Smurfee McGee rained his opening salvos down around me and my people tonight. Thousands were lost in this unprovoked attack. As I walked through the aftermath, stopping to pray with the injured and puke on the really gross ones, I steeled myself inside. I knew at that moment what must be done, so that future generations may live in peace.

Even Max can't stand the sight of this decrepit being.


This conflict must be ended. Once and for all. Only one of us will walk away McGee and that one shall be ME! Rather than hide behind my people, as if they were fodder (like you cowardly do), I have sent them off to safer lands. I have placed my children with those I can trust to keep them safe. I have regrettably had to postpone my nuptials with my new bride and walk away from everything and everyone I love. I'm coming for you McGee.



I am coming alone my dear Smurfee, with a backpack full of knives and socks filled with quarters. No longer shall I perch atop a ladder outside your window and fap. I shall perch atop a ladder and KILL now. Then I'll fap... because well... it's me. That's kinda my thing. Anyways, I shall be hiding in every shadow, every dream, every.... something. Do not worry too much yet though, you shall not be first. First I shall erase everything you love and cherish.

FROM BEHIND! LIKE A NINJA! OR A PORN GUY!


When everything you know and love is gone. Then you can start to worry. That's when I shall pounce upon you, like the lithe, 6' 4" 250lbs. cat I am. That's when my knives will begin stabbing into you repeatedly until I find your cold blue heart and cease it's beating, once and for all.



Or I'll just post a bunch of stupid shit here and crack jokes at you on Twitter, whatever.
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About Mike Martinone of us since 9:50 PM on 04.21.2009

Formerly known as PhilKenSebben. He is now 34 and old and one of your Community Managers. Focusing on community playdates, contests, streaming and modding. He will never be Andy Dixon. He probably hates you as well (He's lying about that). He loves the cock though. He used to run The Low(er) Tier, he podcasted (and is now on PStoid, led by dudes in pants) and got into development and then fell out of it. He says he enjoys nothing (his fat ass loves tacos though), but his known interests (besides games) are: reading, hiking, playing with his kids, yelling at old(er) people, collecting various urine samples, stalking Smurfee, bad MSPaint work, thinking about working out, itching his bare butthole and seeing how long he can go without smelling his finger and Batman. He loves old school cars (Chevy), football (Packers & Niners) and of course: Vidya Gamze!

His favorite games as a wee lass were: SMB3, Gunstar Heroes, Commander Keen, Blake Stone, Doom/Quake, Excitebike, Anything from Sierra/Lucasarts and MK. Now days He is a filthy game slut. Keen on TBS and Roguelikes mostly. The replayability makes his dick hard. He also is known to be playing FPS online and headshotting your ass. He's always down to game with anyone, so feel free to hit him up on whatever you see I'm on. He's been on Dtoid quite awhile now (almost 8 years) and has been involved in numerous off the radar things like contests, recaps, Community Managing and spreading his AIDS. You You could find him lurking mainly in the forums, but yeah. Now he's a qpost whore. He also checks for spam and spreads his love here and there in cblogs and the fp. He loves you sick bastards. In a sexy non-sexual way.



He is also on that thar Tweetarr @MikeMcPhil. Feel free to hit him up, He is always down to chat or lend an ear to someone in need.

Him Roberto Planktonfied:



Him Turvey-fied:



A fucking Xeno:



His career interview by Nihil

His Community Interview

Phil on Communitoid

Some Low(er) Tier Podcasts

Fapcasts can be found here

Twitch.tv Profile




His nasty wordcloud from Twitter:


His theme from the amazing Alphadeus:

Xbox LIVE:PhilK3nS3bb3n
PSN ID:MickGuerrera
Steam ID:hillbillysk8


 

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