so you might have heard about the triple A mega smash hit game that is Dark Souls. While the universe doesn't really expose much of itself the game has a pretty rich world with a ton of cool lore. Blogs about this have even been frontpaged already
. And while this entry even covers the baddest bitch in town, it does not enough. Gravelord Nito
, this is my love letter to you. And after it you will love him too. Why you should love him?
1. He has the looks!
Just look at this fucker! He is a skeleton that basically wears a cloak of darkness and, oh, wait... MORE SKELETONS! Yes, you're seeing that right. This guy isn't content with just being basically a huge ass skeleton himself, no. He hangs more skeletons around his neck and walks around like that. Who wouldn't think this is cool? Nobody, that's who.
Also, this dude is ALWAYS smiling. "Oh, but Jim, he doesn't even have a real face to frown." Fuck you! Shut up! He is always smiling. And that is attractive! You can run around in these armor parts that you have pillaged from undead soldiers and sentient trees, you'll NEVER look as cool as this guy. A timeless style. 2. He has the status!
Nito is the first of the dead. We don't really know how or why, but practically this dude pulled a Gandalf. At some point he must have died and then said "You know what, naw. BRB." Now he is legendary in the whole kingdom of Lordran. If you're seen with this dude you will find your photo most likely in any tabloid in the whole kingdom the next day. Who the fuck is Brad Pitt?
Not only that, he even has his own covenant! And you don't get your own covenant that easy, there are only nine in the whole world. But Nito? Nito has his own. If you join you basically start infecting some poor sob's world with black Phantoms. 3. He has the skills!
"Nito unleashed a miasma of death and disease.
" ~ Dark Souls Intro
Now basically this dude can spread AIDS at will in fog form. He just has to put his hands in the air like he just doesn't care and BAM - AIDS fog everywhere. Of course he can also summon an infinite number of skeleton soldiers and has his big ass sword, but why would you even want to use these ressources when you can just kill any life with some purple fog? 4. He has the personality!
While everything in the whole kingdom and their dogs are so aggressive like our own usedtabe when he doesn't get his roids and try to kill you, Nito is actually the most chill dude around. You know what thiy guy does all day long? Chill out in his fucking coffin. I mean, do you see this asshole here
? That's Pinwheel. A total loser, trust me.
So what does Pinwheel do all day? "Science". But because he is such a fucking loser he needed power of Nito for his science. Imagine someone stealing your power by taking a cable and jamming it in your fuse box. That's basically what Pinwheel did.
You know what Nito did then? Fucking NOTHING. He didn't care. He just wanted to chill out. So he kept chilling out. For fuck's sake, he would have most likely just GIVEN you his Lord Soul if you would ask him for it. Nito doesn't care. I mean, god damn it, you even stay in his covenant after you murdered him! 5. He's Nito!
Seriously, this fucker is adorable. You better love him. And while other enemies are cool too
, no one was ever so laid back and cool as Nito was.
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