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You think you love a genre, and then you play: Nobunaga's Ambition

Day 1

So I run down to the mailbox to check for my new gamefly rental. Bill, Bill, credit card...Bill, jury duty notice, ahh... here's the shit.I had put Lost Odyssey at the top of the list with about ten other selections below and in low availability, so I'm about to get my rpg on after I un-wrap this.... Oh... Nobunaga's Ambition:Rise to Power. For the PS2. Ok... It feels like I just got socks on Christmas morning, but it all good. Dammit.

But its cool, I put this on my game que at some time or another. Which means that me of the past had wanted to play it. Actually, I alwayse noticed this title on the shelf and wondered why it felt so exclusionary. Only the most Japanese among my group of gamers played it and even they walked away a bit shell shocked. When I would ask about it they simply mumble something about watching my farm production and shuffle off. Hey, I played most of the Harvest moon series. So on the subject of farming, I feel "you can't tell me Nuuuthhinn!" Thank you.

But It can't be all that bad. I mean, they are in game 100,000,000 of the series. I hear you can dispatch spies, and murder Ronin. And I do hate me some Bum ass, lazy ass Ronin. So I guess I can just crank up my trusty old PS Deuce and give this Period piece a good bleeding. Ugh. I just read that last sentence.

So I will play it. But not today. I'm still working my way through the old Fallouts. I got CoD 4. Gotta hit up a little Puzzle quest. Just to keep the skills sharp. And then there is, you know, Work. But yeah, its on the list. I promise I will not send this game back until I have given it its fair shake. Definitely. tomorrow.

Day 10

Oh, Nobunaga's Ambition. Hey. Little guy. You still here? Ok, lets go ahead and see what all of the fuss is about. Cool, so I pop it in and, what's this? A twenty section tutorial... Wow. That's not that scary. Just saving money on paper.

I'm introduced to Nobunaga, who is this Lazy rich kid who is visited by the ghost of his dead father. His father teaches him how to run his Diamyo, which is like the equivalent of a European's piece of land in Feudal times.And after about a Dickens book worth of text, its time for Ghost dad to take his kid around and show him the ropes.

Here is how you farm. Here is how you allocate resources for the acquisition of new lands while focusing on an agriculture based economy. Here is how you deliver plans to your lieutenants and place them in the best position to create positive revenue streams based on their strengths. Here is how you wage war on your neighbors for no other reason than they are there. Here is how you control your people with an iron fist. You know. The basics. Great. So part one through three of the tutorial is knocked out. Can't wait for section four. And it only took... two hours. I'll get to the rest tomorrow.

Day 20

Oh, my fucking god. It just sits there on the table, staring. "I thought you liked RPG's J4RMZ?" "I thought you enjoyed story driven titles?"" What's wrong? is NOBUNAGA TO AWESOME FOR YOU?!? HA. HA." Fuck you, Nobunaga's Ambition. You are just there, clogging up my gamefly cue.Knowing I can't send you back until I have at least gotten out of your damn tutorial. For honors sake. I have 17 MORE of those left! I can't do this. This is just to much. What are you, Nobunaga's Ambition? Are you a RTS? RPG? Adventure?Political Drama? Excel spreadsheet? Passions? What? Tell me! Damn you. Look at my hands. I'm sweating. Damn, I'm seein' Demons! this game is work. Its the book report I never did. Its the Albatross around my balls. No, I said I was going to do this, and that is what I am going to do. Even If it kills me.

Day 30

Last... Tutorial... Something about the proper use of archers during sieges using the L2 shortcut, and something else about paying tribute to connecting fiefs... almost... done... The tutorial is done. Now I am sending this fucking pox on my house back to the hell from which it spawned. Gamefly. You taught me a valuable lesson about myself by sending me this...Game. You taught me my limits. Nobunaga. You defeated me today...
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About J4RMZone of us since 12:39 PM on 12.26.2007

Spectacular, yes.

I am 32,live in San Diego. I work at a Game Company that shall remain nameless
(beware the lurkers)doing and writing unspeakable things that look and sound like *bloop-bloorp* all day.

When the elderly laugh, I die a little inside.

I play:

Dat' Madden(Nugga) [stereotype]

What are you wearing?

I am into hip-hop and video games... at the same time. Don't be scared. I am not here to steal your Walkman or whatever it was Jamall did to you that day that made you hate black people forever. If it helps, think of me as that one black dude that dies in the scary movie, but before doing so opens a door or something that the heroes eventually escape through. And at the end of the film when the police and emt's are milling about the crime scene and the heroes are sitting on the edge of an ambulance sipping warm coffee covered in a blanket, they look up to the heavens and they see me,Sidney Poitier,and Morgan Freeman, Nodding our heads in approval.

Xbox LIVE:J4rmz


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