dark        

Handy blog header photo
Handy's c-blog
Fronts 7Posts 0Blogs 63Following 44Followers 95


 

 
 

Is Toad Middle Eastern?

First, we discovered that the clouds and bushes in Super Mario Bros. were using the same sprite.† Later, mankind theorised that the entirety of Super Mario Bros 3. was actually a stage play. And now, I have unearthed the next ďit was ther...

 
 
 

2013 in Gaming: Better/Worse than Ever

What a year, eh? Another triumphant year for current gen consoles, the introduction of the next generation, the higher standards of AAA experiences and the greater exposure and availability of indie games. Yep, itís a pretty great time to b...

 
 
 

Carry Over Saves Are a Near Impossible Dream.

Can The Walking Dead deliver on its promise of past decisions affecting Season Two? Carry over saves were a revolutionary idea, the concept that decisions you made could have repercussions that went beyond just later on in the game, but c...

 
 
 

Fanart Flops: Sonic walks with Christ, do you? (NSFW)

Welcome to Fanart Flops, the blog that insists fanart is one word no matter what spell check says. For those not in the know Fanart Flops is a collection of the oddest and most confusing videogame fanart by otherwise talented artists. The b...

 
 
 

7 Demos better than their own game.

WARNING: THERE WILL BE NO MENTION OF ALIENS. Thereís been a lot of talk of demos lately since it was suggested at DICE that demos hurt more than they help in terms of sales, to which we all responded smugly and said ďHa, only the rubbi...

 
 
 

Sex: No. No no no no no no nonononononono. NO.

If you canít do sex right, donít do it at all. Thatís why I donít do sex, and thatís why developers shouldnít either. Iím no prude, sex is a natural part of life and an unavoidable storytelling device, the thing is I donít think gaming ca...

 
 
 

The Big Bang Theoryís Greatest Game Moments.

Finally, weíve received the social acceptance weíve strived so hard for. For years we were the victim of bullying and mean spirited jokes but finally, finally, nerds and gamers are no longer singled out as socially maladjusted manbabies....

 
 
 

Search my name? Thatís just masturbation.

So this is a thing now. But after searching my name I only found out thereís a lot of sad people out there that share my name and feel the need to self aggrandise on Urban Dictionary. So unless you legitimately believe that on the day of yo...

 
 
 

Metal Gear Rising: Impractions

Yes, that is a combination of impressions and reactions, expect much more wordbining in the spirit of Revengeance. So, the Metal Gear Rising demo has been in the hands of those who bought the ZOE Collection for quite some time now, and se...

 
 
 

Itís All About Context.

Iíve always been of the mind that while men and women are (obviously) equal they are not identical, and Iím going to speak really carefully here to get my point across without accidentally offending anyone, what I mean is that speaking on...

 
 
 

Fanart Flops: Foot Fetish Krang Edition.

Welcome to Fanart Flops, the horrifying videogame fanart feature that did it first, Something Awful and Kotaku .......even though thereís probably a dozen people who did it before me. As always, for those of you who donít know (run, run a...

 
 
 

I Gots Dibs on Gaige, yo.

Some people might think itís stupid to stake a claim on a character we know next to nothing about and wonít get to use for a month, but I consider it prudent, because Gaige is most definitely the best character by far, so good Gearbox decid...

 
 
 

50 Cent: Blood on the Sand, Tears in my Eyes.

ďThat bitch took my skull.Ē Ė 50 Cent, poet laureate. 50 Cent: Blood on the Sand is a deeply personal journey, both for the player and 50 Cent himself, putting to light some harsh truths about gangster culture, videogames as an interactive...

 
 
 

Adopt an Avatar: giving people Handys at PAX

Well, this place has been all about the community spirit lately hasnít it? And you know one of the loveliest community traditions Dtoid members carry out every year? Thatís right, avatar adoption! The wonderful act of Dtoiders going to PAX ...

 
 
 

Dear Industry: I Am Not a Psychopath

(Back to blogging! Itís been far too long, after another stint in the hospital and some minor surgery Iím finally feeling well enough to start writing again, if all goes well I can keep it up semi-regularly again.) (Iím sure youíre thrill...

 
 
 

Game plots that are clearly rip-offs: Part two

(One of these days, one of these days Iíll write two blogs in a row without getting sick and disappearing for a few months.) Well, here we are again. After last times shocking exposť you think game developers wouldnít try to pull this sor...

 
 
 

The Boy Who Cried Wolf.

Once upon a time there was a little shepherd boy who looked after the sheep of a village, the boy loved spending time with the sheep, you see these were special interactive sheep, he much preferred them over the other the other, more passiv...

 
 
 

How Dare You, Capcom.

How dare you, Capcom. Youíve got some nerve, waltzing in here like you own the place and slapping your loyal fans right in fucking face with your giant ball-top style cock. After everything Iíve done for you, Capcom, you have the cheek, the...

 
 
 

Darksiders 2 in a nutshell.

Darksiders 2 is nothing if not thematically consistent... Iíll be generous here and ignore the poorly textured floor made entirely of skulls. I realise I missed his knees here but I also ignored the big pile of skulls...

 
 
 

A Very Failblog Christmas

Merry Christmas Destructoid! Chances are if youíre reading this youíre having a lovely time relaxing by the warm glow of the internet, or, you had to get the hell out of there and let your brain rest for a minute, either way my mind-dulling...

 
 
 

Final Fantasy Versus Itself.

(I know, worst title ever) Hey, you know those stupid prediction articles that are all made up of guesswork skewed by the writerís personal preferences, the ones that serve to only stroke the writerís ego as they furrow their brows and pre...

 
 
 

Fanart Flops: Back by (Un)Popular Demand.

Welcome to Fanart Flops, the Destructoid blog series that stole its intro style from Annotated Anime over on Japanator, and I bet you didnít even notice! For those not in the know, or the unscarred as we call them, Fanart Flops is a colle...

 
 
 

Only Human

My god it feels like forever since I wrote something, mostly because of this thick slurry of videogames we call October to January, one such game being Dark Souls, a game I have no doubt led to at least one divorce or child beating out of t...

 
 
 

Death to Red Shepard!

Some time ago, Bioware announced that they would be holding a vote on the default appearance of the female protagonist of Mass Effect, commonly referred to as ďFemShepĒ. The vote was held, the people spoke, and a blonde FemShep was chosen...

 
 
 

Adopt an avatar: A Helping Hand!

PAX is upon us, the Destructoid social event of the year, where the whoís who of videogames come to rub shoulders and sip fine champagne out of hollowed out Mega Drive cartridges. And, much like any enjoyable social event, I wonít be ther...

 
 
 

East vs. West: The Culture Gap.

[Disclaimer Thingamajig: This is more or less the same as a blog I posted at the start of the year, but it seemed to fit in with the topic for Monthly Musing or Weekly-whatever-we-call-it-now, so I thought Iíd put it up again. Anyway this i...

 
 
 

Gamings Greatest Slinky Invisible Women with Huge Asses.

A rather specific topic for a list blog no? But itís come to my attention that a certain type of woman repeatedly appears in games lately. Right alongside the women that only exist to be saved, the ones who are just walking plot devices, or...

 
 
 

E3 Approaches: The E3 survival guide!

My friends, a storm approaches. Not a storm of wind and rain, but a storm of information and other metaphors I canít think of right now because Iíve been drinking. But as we stand before this harsh gale, ready to be soaked to the bone, I of...

 
 
 

I Have Risen.

Hello Destructoid, wow itís been so long, youíre looking good, have you lost weight? Iíve finally made my long awaited (by no one) return to the sandy shores of Destructoid beach, where the fish are always biting and itís okay to stomp on s...

 
 
 

Hospitals are boring and I love you guys.

Hey, you know what sucks? Hospitals. I should know, Iíve been in one for the last three weeks and can expect to stay there for a few more still. Thankfully, however, Iím now well enough to spend the weekends at home, and whatís the first th...

 
 

About Handyone of us since 1:44 PM on 09.14.2009

Welcome to the blog.... you must be bored. anyway im Handy, I'm a student in Ireland and I'm here to talk about whatever may come into my mind....so not much then.

Lets see... Iíve been playing games pretty much my whole life, since my Commodore back in the day to my ps3 now Iíve been hooked. Actually come to think of it I canít remember a time I wasnít playing games. Canít say I have a favourite genre, I like to try a bit of everything, though I will go to town on a good RPG. Iíll have something to fill in this space as soon as my life becomes interesting.

^^^ Seriously, I wrote that like four years ago and still nothing interesting has happened.



Like everyone else on Destructoid Iím at a loss on what to fill this space with so I guess Iíll just catalogue my greatest hits, if you can call a loose collection of lists and borderline pornographic fanart ďgreatest hitsĒ.



Listmania Ė Because liking something isnít as important as liking it in the correct order.

Game plots that are clearly rip-offs: Part two

Gamings Greatest Slinky Invisible Women with Huge Asses

E3 Approaches: The E3 survival guide!

Something about E3: 34 things youíll have to hear soon

Lost? Lonely? Looking for Love?

Gamingís worst legal guardians

Gaming DIY

Valentineís Day, Shmalentineís.....Shmay

Get a new look at the Gaming Salon!

Hatesgiving

The NPC survival guide

Game lessons that donít work in real life



Fanart Flops Ė Because you must suffer.

Fanart Flops: Back by (Un)Popular Demand

Fanart Flops: Eyebleach, I Choose You Edition

Fanart Flops: Octopus Hojo Edition

Fanart Flops: Stop Raping My Childhood Edition

Fanart Flops. (Possibly NSFW)



Wankery Ė The terrible results of when I pretend Iím smart.

Dear Industry: I Am Not a Psychopath

Final Fantasy Versus Itself

Only Human


The culture Gap



Sargasm Ė Because Iím kind of a dick.

Darksiders 2 in a nutshell

The Boy Who Cried Wolf

How Dare You, Capcom

Death to Red Shepard!

How to make a sequel

Why FFXIII is the worst one EVAR!

The Scandalous Scam of Samit Sarkar!

In the name of SCIENCE!!!




Front page Ė When Destructoid has terrible lapses in judgement.


Top 12 Videogame porno parodies (NSFW)

Handyís X-mas X-travaganza begins now!

Game plots that are clearly rip-offs

Comments of the Week: Busst Stop

Comments of the week: George Michael Warfare 3



Donít forget Comments of the Week

Comments of the Week: Tinfoil Hat Edition







Just because.
 
BACK NEXT