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Why does Facebook mean so much to these idiots?

I can honestly take or leave social networking sites. I usually find myself logging in and staying logged in most of the day, just for something to look at when I'm bored. I like to see how some of my school colleagues are doing and try and sneak the odd live chat in with them if I'm free.

My girlfriend's cousin is an incredibly sad person when it comes to Facebook. For starters she's added about 500 "friends" to her list that she hardly even knows. Some of them are friends of a friend, some of them are even friends of friends of friends of a friend. She is also one of these dickheads that feels the need to inform everyone of her status every five seconds. "I've just got up!" she'll put one minute, "I'm just about to have some cheese on toast!" she'll add five minutes later "Just about to wake my son-shine up!". I am waiting for the day that she puts "I've just struggled with a monsterous turd."

What bothers me though, and what takes this woman one rung lower on the 'Sad Bastard' ladder of social networking in my eyes is that over the months she has had a laptop she has painted this rosey picture of her life (of which most of it is utter bullshit) and worse of all she actually cares what people think of her pointless musings.

My girlfriend and I go round to her couin's house on a regular basis and the truth of the matter is that she is a bit of a scrote. She has two kids, one of whom is bordering on being a teen that is probably going to end up in jail at some point and the other that is one of the most annoying, mard-arse, manipulative toddlers that I have met in my life.

Her fiance is actually a fairly nice guy, but has no financial sense whatsoever and would rather spend the little money he gets from his job on a new x-box 360 game than buy food for his kids. They live on borrowed money constantly and buy their TV, furniture and gadgets at 160% of the normal price from these high interest stores. When I pop round to watch the football (soccer) she'll sit with a face on her playing on Facebook or internet bingo.

They argue, she'll scream and shout on a regular basis whilst my partner and I sit there wondering why we visited there again and I can't help but think that she lives in a self-created shit life.

Yet on Facebook you'd think that she lives in The Grange. What a great and sunny life this woman must live! She calls her toddler son "My son-shine" even though the kid is clearly a little shit and I have actually seen her post "I love my boyfriend <3 x x x x x x" on Facebook about two minutes after we've witnessed them both have a huge slanging match and the atmosphere is still in thei air. She posts opinions on things that she really doesn't give a shit about just for a reaction. She once asked me "How did Manchester United play just now?" and then seen my opinion dressed as hers on Facebook that very evening.

I got tired of this charade at one point and posted up something funny on her boyfriends Facebook page one day at work. I saw her log out of her facebook account, log into her boyfriends account (she must have nicked his password) and then my post was mysteriously deleted. She's done the same with stuff I've posted on her Facebook site in response to her comments. She'll tell me that her boyfriend wasn't happy about me posting something on her site only for me to find out later that he didn't even know about it.

It obviously means a hell of a lot to her to keep up this pretense that her life is absolutely rosey, when it is actually a pile of steaming, sticky shit. Then when someone like me pops up and jokes that she is a "cheesy f***er" she removes it as quickly as possible because it is actually a nugget of truth in her otherwise perfect virtual world. I suppose I should feel sorry for her as much as anything.

Why does it mean so damn much to people like her?
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About Gawii UKone of us since 8:55 AM on 03.31.2009

Xbox LIVE:garybuller


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