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Calm down! You'll survive this!


So Tuesday morning... 8:02 am pacific time... I'm running late this morning because the neighbor's dog spent most of the night barking at a racoon that was sitting on the top of the fence between our two properties. I haven't seen the racoon around in awhile, but I think it's the same guy that used to hang out here for a bit last year. I couldn't get back to sleep, so I had a restless night and I'm cranky this morning. Ok, coffee in hand and I'm on to my usual routine. Destructoid - crap, no connection to server, the site must be down again. Wait, nothing is coming up... no internet. What? Double Crap! Ok, deep breath, let's make a call, they can almost always fix it with a phone call.

After 103 minutes on hold (I love that my phone tells me this), I finally get a real live person on the line. I immediately don't like him, I don't know why, but it turns out my suspicions are correct. He tells me it must be my wiring. I explain that the cable company was just here a month and a half ago and that all the wiring was re-done. I explain that my internet is coming off the same cable as my TV and my TV signal is fine. I'm sure it's their crappy Cisco modem and ask for a tech to drop off a new modem. No, I'll have to wait till Thursday for a service call... and he's SURE it's the wiring.

Panic starts to slowly set in. NO INTERNET. Not for about 3 whole days. Life comes crashing down. No Destructoid. No email. No watching TV shows on my iPad. Wait... no online gaming! Arrrgh!! No checking the PSN store today. My panic state starts to climb. I can do without phone... because I have email. I can do without cable TV because I can access all the TV shows I want on the internet. I can even do without heat so long as I have the escapism of a video game and a cozy blanket... but no internet... how will I survive for three whole days!

Panic begets ingenuity. Ok, one of my neighbors must have unsecured internet. After walking around to various parts of the house and yard with my iPad held high over my head to get the bestest possible smidgen of a signal... no, apparently all my neighbors have secured internet. Hey wait, I have an old modem... the one that ran with my 25 mbps internet before I upgraded to 50 mbps and the required crappy Cisco modem. Found it!... deep in that closet where all the old electronics go to die... buried between a 19" LCD TV that only takes HDMI and all the other inputs crapped out right after the warranty expired, and the old PC - the pre-laptop one with the huge tower and 19" monitor that were too big for our small house. Hmm... I have two 19" LCD screens here that kinda work... I really must think of something to do with them later. There must be way of making an old monitor into a spare TV... I can look it up on the inter.. crap. No I can't.

Ok, modem hooked up... nothing. Hmmm... it likely has to be activated. Ok, call my ISP again. Luckily I got the call back option and I leave my number. I wander aimlessly around the house... and start cleaning... something to do in my state of internet-less depression. I sweep the floors and start mopping... even going so far as to take a rag and clean out all the little spots the mop can't get to under counters and in those odd places. Maybe I'm too addicted to the internet, maybe it will actually do me good not to have internet for a few days. I can change my routines. I turn on the TV while I'm cleaning and flip open my iPod to check the TV guide... crap, that's right, no internet. Ok, I'll have to do it the old fashioned way, view the onscreen guide and pick a show - then find out if I get that channel in my TV package or not. Meh, I'll just go to A&E. I know I get that channel and they pretty much show CSI/Criminal Minds reruns all day! Crisis averted. Floor is done! Ok, maybe I can start thinking about a fancy dinner... I'll just look up a recipe in one of the cookbook apps on my iPad.... crap! Ok, no fancy dinner. Shit, I apparently can't even cook without the internet.

The phone rings and it's a new guy from my cable company/ISP. I explain about the wiring and that I think it's crap and I want to try my old modem. He activates it... and we wait for the blinking lights... Hallelujah! The "online" light is solid green! I thank him profusely and explain that I'll use the my old modem until the Thursday service call when I'll get my new and faster but crappy Cisco modem replaced.

Almost an entire day without internet. I survived. I'm going to play MAG online tonight because I'm lonely. I miss the voices... the voices on Dtoid, the voices in online play... the voices other than the ones in my head.

Still... there's that one voice that won't shut up and it's saying that maybe I should unplug more often. It's saying that I'm too dependent on the internet, that my life is too routine. But I did find a nice recipe for Pork Diane for dinner tonight!

So I played MAG last night, and the Pork Diane was lovely (I'll definitely do that recipe again), and today I'm back to my routine. I'm here on Dtoid reading blogs, finishing off this scribble of a blog that I started yesterday. Tomorrow though... yeah, maybe tomorrow I'll break my routine... I'm in a rut. It's not just my internet-dependency issue, it's gaming too. I've been playing MAG for over two years now... I keep looking for a new "regular" online game to play, but just haven't found it yet. Homefront wasn't it, Battlefield 3 is apparently not going to be it... meh, I just hope I get in the Starhawk beta and that Starhawk will be "it". When I'm not playing online shooter games, I'm playing WRPG's. They all have a sameness about them... main quest, side quests, loot/armour/stuff management. I finished Fallout 3 and am now playing Divinity 2 on the Xbox while waiting on the expansion pack for Two Worlds 2 and the upcoming release of Skyrim. I try other games... mostly demos... but they just don't really appeal.

Baby steps... I'm gonna go buy and download Scribblenaughts on my iPad. It'll be one tiny step out of my rut... and maybe tomorrow morning I'll watch TV with my coffee for a change.
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About Elsaone of us since 2:27 PM on 01.25.2009

I'm 55 years old. I'm female, a cancer survivor, happily married, and retired from the work force... and I spend way too much time gaming. I enjoy long walks on the beach, with a gun, sometimes with my husband - shooting n00bs.
I not only like to shoot people, I also enjoy cooking and crafting. Mostly I make my own armor in games like Skyrim and cook my own potions after a busy day of hacking and slashing my way through various critters, guards and bandits in most any WRPG game.

If you're into a threesome or foursome with a mature couple, then come join us - only be sure to bring a med kit. We're old, sometimes we fall down and can't get back up without some help!

PSN: Elsa
XBL: Elssa62
(I currently have an Xbox 360, PS3, PS4, PSVita, a barely functioning PSP, and a variety of iOS/Android devices)

Recent Favorites:
MAG (over 2000 hours!)
Dragon's Dogma
Portal 1&2
Sacred 2
Demon Souls/Dark Souls
Bioshock series
Elder Scrolls Series (Oblivion and Skyrim)
Fallout series
Tomb Raider series
Dragon Age series
Resistance series
Killzone Series
Left 4 Dead 2
Mass Effect Series
Far Cry Series
Destiny (strangely addicting)

Some blogs I wrote that I like:

Fun Facts about Females
Casting Call: Chester the Skeleton
Help, Help! I'm being repressed
Girls with Guns
Guess the Gender
A Girl's Guide to FPS Gaming
Me and My Chainmail Bikini...
Adopt a Troll!
Fanboy Wars - the game!
Me and my digital dick
Invisibility of the older woman
Feminist Frequency and Relevance

Some of my Promoted C-Blogs:
Undies and a Knife
He dumped me! That Bastard!
Love/Hate: Being a Girl Gamer
The Future: The Year is 2029
My Expertise: Leader of Men
The Great Escape: From Physical Pain
More than Just Noise: Boom Headshot!
2010 Sucked: Game Addiction Issues
Technical Difficulties: He teabagged me!

Email: exrecruiter.at.msn.com


Xbox LIVE:Elssa62


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