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Something about Sex: Meh... Moderatism Inevitable in this one

Before I begin, let me just say that I AM THE EXACT TYPE OF PERSON THAT EVERYBODY ON DESTRUCTOID THINKS IS MOST LIKELY GOING TO FALL INTO THE SO-CALLED "SEX-TRAP." I am a 14-year-old, hormonal teenager who is socially awkward and has very little chance of getting laid unless he hires a hooker. And for that, let's throw in the fact that in the odd case I do get married or get a girlfriend, it would be a casual girlfriend, as no girl could possibly like me for the crazy, mildly-autistic, unfunny person I am.


And yes, the constant school pressure, my own social inability and THE TEENAGE ANGST THAT MUST BE DESTROYED AT ALL COSTS is making me slowly go crazy...every...second.

And you know for the most part, the "trap" is working. And for the most part, I really could care less.

It seems that as companies have tried and tried again to use sex the move copies off of the shelf, we have been trying to find a compromise between allowing us to see some god damned titties and trying to look like we still care about "Games as Art." Hypocrites.

Either way, you know, I really don't care. And here's why:


At this point, you are probably just thinking about how much of a terrible writer I am. But in the end, Who cares about sex? Sure, I like to be turned on by the occasional glimpse of boobs, but hell, does that really affect the game? I mean, I like to see it as "icing on the cake" (bad metaphor, I know), but never considered buying a game for it's sexual content. That's what the internet is for! If other people want to buy a game for boobs (COUGH*Saboteur*COUGH) than let them do that, but it doesn't affect me.

And also, on the subject of using sex as a storytelling device, GO RIGHT A-FUCKING-HEAD! See what I did there? I made a "head" joke without you noticing. Witty, arent' I?


Okay, I know at this point, you guys don't care, but it seems like no one has a moderate voice anymore. I'm a 60-year-old experienced mind inside of a body that is still affected by hormones and angst, and I have to deal with the annoying extremes teenagers put themselves through, and when I see extremes here, it just makes me want to leave. I try to be as logical as possible without ruining everyone's fun.

And yet, all I can think about is how much I want to have a girlfriend and how much I want to play TF2.

I'm really sorry I put you through this unorganized, depressed mess.

Herp derp derp.
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About Eaten by a Grueone of us since 10:23 PM on 10.22.2009

Steam: 1UpYours
Battle.net: ProperHardcore

Systems I own:
Nintendo 64
Nintendo Wii
Nintendo DS
Game Boy Advance
Game Boy Color
A crappy PC

Some stuff about me:
To start off with, my very first video game was Madden '97 for the PSX, (Samit Sarkar, you are welcome). I was about 4-years old when I would play the game for a couple of quick matches with my Dad. Everything interested me. To the way I could press triangle when I made a touchdown (which happened rarely, thanks to my lacking gaming skills), to running towards my endzone just to see what would happen. Also, it was fun to play with someone and have that interaction. Other than that, I had a Super Demo disc, that contained different demos of about 100 different games, and watching my Dad play Duke Nukem and Unreal Tournament. I also got my first Game Boy, and my first game: Space Invaders.

Well, when I was five, I was sent to a foster home by Child Protection Services. At the foster home, my love for video games grew even stronger. It was there I was introduced to the NES, Super NES, and N64. Of course, being 5 years old, the part of Mario 64 where the Princess Peach picture turns into Bowser sacred the ever-living shit out of me, but I was fine with Turok and other "bloody" games.

I also was introduced to the platformer and the RPG there. Some girls that helped with the foster home would occasionally bring the SNES out and we would play Super Mario World or Final Fantasy with me. I also went to other houses with people and I would get even more exposure to the PC world of gaming.

At around 6 years-old, I started to live with my new parents, who I love and appreciate. However, coming here was a big shock for me. Though my new brother had an N64, and we played Goldeneye like nothing else, my parents weren't too convinced about video games.

Until very recently, I was the socially awkward kid who had trouble making friends at school and fitting in. As a result of this, I got a GameCube and played a lot of single-player games. Favorites include Super Mario Sunshine and OMG IT'S POKEMON! Because I didn't do very well in the social aspect of school, my parents grew even more apprehensive than ever. And then the final nail in the coffin was hammered:

I was diagnosed with Asperger's syndrome.

It doesn't seem like a big deal, but to my parents, they were rushing for answers and support groups. and of course, every therapist I talked to believed video games were the cause. I didn't believe it. I got my video games put away for a half year! But all that came to pass and many struggles later, I got everything back.

After that fiasco, I met my first friend, united by a shared love of video games. He let me borrow 2 games: Counter-Strike and Metal Gear Solid: The Twin Snakes. The Twin Snakes was the best. So many great moments. Gameplay I've never even experienced before. And Psycho Mantis. He shook my conscious like a baby shakes a rattle.

Counter-Strike was by far my oddest experience. Here I was, not even in my teens yet, and I'm getting subjected to constant homophobic threats, racism, and cuss words, all placed upon a background of guns and blood. I think that was what ruined my innocence.

Yet, through the discovery of Counter-Strike, I also discovered the internet. How amazing it was! So many games! So much to learn! And all the time in the world to do it! It changed my life.

So, recently, I've been reconnecting with the games I knew from my childhood: Duke Nukem, Metal Gear Solid, Super Mario Bros. I just want to know what is was like when I was young and ignorant. I think I still have that old copy of Space Inavders.

__________________________________________________ ______________
SUMMARY: I am a varied and exploratory gamer. I'm a male high schooler. I was born with a controller in my hand. I actually know shit about games. Yes, I still love Pokemon.
Steam ID:http://steamcommunity.com/id/1Up


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